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September 30, 2011

CJ Lyons Guest Blogs

Busted By My Playlist

by CJ Lyons    

I live in a rural area and anytime I go for a long drive I often have to rely on my mp3 instead of car radio. Which is fun because I throw my songs on there, hit shuffle, and off we go…at least that's how it's supposed to work.

Twice in the last month I got busted by my playlist.

You see, I like kickass rock n' roll. Doesn't matter if it's old or new as long as it has attitude. Which makes for some rather un-politically correct, not safe for work, non-kid-or old folk-friendly choices.

And since I keep my mp3 on shuffle, I never know what's gonna come out of the speakers next. It could be Led Zeppelin or the Stones or Buck Cherry doing the "dirty" version of Crazy Bitch.

Yeah, crank that over your speakers as you drive into the courthouse parking lot, ready to report for jury duty. Then park between a sheriff's cruiser and a Cadillac that probably belongs to a lawyer or judge.

 Worse? Forget the sunroof is open and sing along at the top of your lungs.

 (If you don't know the song, practically every other word is the F-bomb.)

 Those dirty looks were nothing compared to the tongue-lashing one of my friends gave me as we were driving together and Nickelback's Something in your Mouth came on.

 (yes, THAT is what the song's about…one of Nickelback's favorite themes)

 She's a true blue feminist and felt my choice in music was a betrayal of the cause, setting back women's rights fifty years.

 I had no defense other than, "it's got a good beat."

 "It's misogynistic."

 "Not as bad as their Figured You Out."

 She hit the fast forward button. Saving Abel, The Sex is Good. Scowled at me, hit it again.

 Saved by the Stones, Sympathy for the Devil.

 I relaxed, steered the conversation to a safe place. Of course that's when Puddle of Mud's Control came on.

 Otherwise known as the "smack your ass" song.

 What can I say? I gave up, and sang along. Heck, if you're gonna be busted by your playlist, you might as well have fun doing it.

 So you tell me, when has your choice in pop culture led to you being busted?

 C'mon, you know what I mean--that hidden DVD with the best of Gilligan's Island, the tattered, well-read copy of Mad magazine, the Sonny and Cher album you can't bear to part with…. 

As a pediatric ER doctor, CJ Lyons has lived the life she writes about in her cutting edge Thrillers with Heart.  In addition to being an award-winning, New York Times Bestseller, CJ is a nationally known presenter and keynote speaker. 

CJ has been called a "master within the genre" (Pittsburgh Magazine) and her work has been praised as "breathtakingly fast-paced" and "riveting" (Publishers Weekly) with "characters with beating hearts and three dimensions" (Newsday).

Her newest project is as co-author of a new suspense series with Erin Brockovich.  Learn more about her writing on her website, cjlyons.net    


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Too funny, CJ. But it's all about singing in the car, and car dancing, isn't it?

Shh, don't tell anyone, but I've been a closet Carpenters fan since Karen and Richard first hit the charts. I know every word of every song, and can sing it with exactly the same inflection poor, starved-to-death Karen warbled.

Imagine my shock when my 40-year old, corporate lawyer son-in-law confessed to a deep devotion to WKRQ in Cincinnati, the TV show from the 80's. My daughter, his wife, thinks we're both corny as Kansas. :-)

Hey, Kansas resembles that! : )

Hi,CJ, and welcome. The Rolling Stones, "Under My Thumb."

Well, my daughter always makes me fast-forward when The Subhumans' "Slave to My Dick" comes on, or Lucille Bogan or The Asylum Street Spankers' versions of "Shave 'em Dry," but my personal favorite is Iggy and the Stooges doing all the words to "Louie, Louie." Thank GOD I don't have a sunroof!!!

My addiction to the Netflix streaming of every episode of Rocky and Bullwinkle and the original Star Trek.

LOL! You guys are definitely my kind of closet car-singer/dancers!

Thanks so much for having me here today!
CJ, off to check out Rocky and Bullwinkle on Netflix!

NancyP, "Under My Thumb" is the only Stones song I have ever liked. I wonder what that says about me? Us?

The closest I got is that I've been a Cure fan since before Robert Smith starting wearing lipstick. And I still love that chubby, wild-haired, smeary-faced mess of a man with all my heart.

Ramona, we must be responding to its heartfelt sincerity. : D

Oh, this made me laugh! Every single time I hear that Buck Cherry song or Closer by The Downward Spiral (or any number of other songs), I grin and think "I should NOT like this song at all!" But I do. The louder, the better.

I tell people that only having had brothers and sons has made me unfit for any polite company anywhere, ever.

Karen, I loved WKRP! (and my mom did, too) -- one more thing we have in common. My listening is usually pretty tame, but I do admit to turning the volume down on parts of _When Stella Got Her Groove Back_, just in case the closed windows weren't enough insulation . . .

This is a bit off topic, but not really. Remember the 80s band, The Association? (Cherish, Windy, Along Came Mary) They are touring and headed to a nearby venue. I received an email alert but the band's name was too long to fit into the subject heading. This is what I received:

"Ramona, here's a special invitation for tickets to see The Ass"

I've been dying to post that somewhere.

Ramona, lol! I guess that means tickets to see Donald Trump.

I think a lot of people would be surprised to find out the Marilyn Manson is on my playlist. Their version of Tainted Love is awesome. I don't have a stereo of any kind in my car so I make do with playing it loud and singing/dancing to it at home. Preferably when the blinds are closed.

I also love me some Neil Diamond . . . Pretty weird when shuffle plays them one after the other. Neil & Marilyn, odd musical juxtaposition.

Welcome CJ! Thanks for the topic.

Also Pearl Necklace by ZZ Top, great tune.

After reading the Keith Richards memoir this summer, I'm on a Stones kick. I never appreciated them much, but now I am. And my neighbors noticed when I pulled into the driveway last weekend with the speakers booming. ;-) Gimme Shelter!

Original Star Trek. ABBA. Sappy 1970's pop. Those Association songs Ramona mentioned :)

Thanks for the smiles, CJ. I am now going to go read Lifeline!

I can't really think of anything I get busted for, mostly because all of my family and friends know my response will be "Shut the fuck up" if they try. Also, nobody who knows me is surprised by anything I do or like. Well, mostly not surprised.

I DO remember my mother nearly having a heart attack when my sister and I put on the Woodstock soundtrack after getting it for Xmas and the "Fish Cheer" came on. By the time Country Joe and the boys got to "Gimme a K", you could see Mom's lower jaw hit the floor. After that, we had to skip that track if Mom was home.

Nancy, I haven't read the book, but am also on a Stones kick, eversince I heard a cover of Gimme Shelter on the season finale of Sons of Anarchy (I watch via Netflix, so I'm a bit behind)...I realized that song was the perfect theme for the book I'm working on now, so it's all Stones all the time with half a dozen covers of Gimme Shelter in the mix...

Am I the only one who does that? (she asks sheepishly)

Big Al the Pizza Dude has loud and/or socially unacceptable music playing most of the time. Here is a sample:

Machine Gun Portishead
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla Ice
Sugar Walls Sheena Easton
Shot In The Dark/Peter Gunn (Under The Gunn Mix) Chris Mancini & Lennart
All She Wants to Do Is Dance Don Henley
Johnny B. Good Chuck Berry
Poker Face Lady GaGa
Paper Planes M.I.A
Take A Walk On The Wild Side Lou Reed
Coming Up (Live Version) Paul McCartney & Wings
Movie Trailer The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Paradise Garage Tim Curry
I Do The Rock Tim Curry
Paradise by the dashboard Meatloaf
Science Fiction / Double Feature Richard O'Brien
Timewarp Rocky Horror Picture Show
Sweet Transvestite Tim Curry
Hot Patootie / Bless My Soul Meat Loaf
Toucha Touch Me Rocky Horror Picture Show -
After Midnight Eric Clapton
Shock Treatment Shock Treatment
Little Black Dress Shock Treatment
After Midnight Eric Clapton
Another Brick in the Wall part 2 Pink Floyd
Night Shift Commodores
Roxanne The Police
Love On A Train Tangerine Dream
In The Air Tonight Phil Collins
Under Pressure David Bowie
Bad To the Bone George Thorogood
I Love Rock'n'Roll Joan Jett & The BlackHearts
Shot In The Dark/Peter Gunn (Under The Gunn Mix) Chris Mancini & Lennart
Locomotion Atomic Kitten
Heavy Metal (Takin' a Ride) Don Felder
Hail Hail Rock & Roll Chuck Berry
Poker Face Lady GaGa
Rockit Herbie Hancock
Tuff Enough Fabulous Thunderbirds
Vacation Go-Go's
Band on the Run Paul McCartney & Wings
I Love Paris In The Springtime Eleni Mandell
Not Ready to Make Nice Dixie Chicks
Miss You Rolling Stones

Hey! It only took 6 times to convince Mr. Typepad to publish!

One night I pull up to a house. Paradise Garage is blaring out of the car. Mommy at the door says "I remember that."

It is from my Rocky Horror Picture Show days. Chances are, if you heard it it was at Rocky. Outside chance Mommy was dressed as Janet, or arrived at the movie in her bra and a torn slip. I did not ask her in front of her kids.

Oh...and the Grateful Dead.

Oh, my GOD! Alan P., I too am a Tim Curry fan. The first time I met him I was overcome with celebrityitis and could only stammer, "I'm such a fan, I even have all your albums" and he said, "Ah, so YOU'RE the one who bought it."

But CJ, this is so timely. I have the misfortune to have my car radio hijacked by preteens, which means All Pop Music, All The Time, and it's just as stupidly addictive as anything else in life. Just this week I had to research my current favorite song online so that I could sing along properly and when I read the lyrics, well . . . gulp.

The song is "Pumped Up Kicks" by Foster the People, and it seems to be about spree killing. Always a fun topic to be celebrating.

CJ, Tainted Love was the theme of my Roxy book, Sticky Fingers. I listened to the song over and over. "Once I ran to you, now I run from you . . . . I love you though you hurt me so . . . "

That's the perfect song for that book! My last book it was Mudvayne's Scream with Me...hmmm...guess it's obvious I write thrillers, lol!

And thanks for the Rocky Horror memories--oh my, now I'm gonna have to revisit those songs as well...thank goodness for YouTube!

I got one! We need at least one hair band contribution:

Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi.

And have you seen Jon Bon Jovi lately? He's made a pact with the Devil. It's the only explanation.

Tim Curry is sex on a stick. I'd be tongue-tied, too!

Ramona, your last comment made me guffaw. They clearly need your mad editing skillz.

The Association came to our high school and performed for a school assembly, in 1969. One of our history teachers, a very worldly Jesuit priest, was friends with one of the members of the group, and he arranged the performance. Looking back now, it sounds like an episode out of Glee.

City of New Orleans, Willie Nelson
Girls, Women, and Ladies, Ed Bruce
Me and Bobby McGee, Kris Kristofferson
Anything by Waylon or the Highwaymen
Good Ole Boys Like Me, Don Williams
Islands in the Stream, Parton & Rogers
Sittin' On the Front Porch Swing, Parton

(I have never been cool . . . sigh)

Okay so I get busted for classical music.
I was a ballerina remember? I can sing all the ballets and not only that...sing the melody and the choreography. If you didn't know I speak ballet.
Nothing like rolling up next to a car shaking with boom boom music with Stravinsky blaring out of your windows!
101 Strings, Montovani and Percy Faith with a splash of the Boston Pops! Be still my heart.
I know all the Association tunes too. Manhattan Transfer harmonies are the best. And Andrews Sisters.
And then Musical Theater. Pick a musical. I know all the songs.
Lady Gaga? Not so much.

FYI, "shuffle" does not work well for audio books . . . I couldn't figure out why my iPod made my Harry Potter book crazy, until a smart young man at Circuit City explained shuffle. When I was teaching, my students would help me with things like that.

I haven't got an iPod or anything i-related, which translates to: I'm woefully behind the trend in music owning and listening--I still have more albums (despite the lack of tuner and the turntable on a shelf in the closet) than CD's, and even my phone's player has only 2-3 songs in it . . . sigh. So, thank heaven for my local station KCRW, which has the greatest eclectic music programming ever. I can almost always find something to crank up the speakers for, morning and evening, and since I'm in the office the rest of the time, no biggie.

But, the sunroof?! Guilty as charged--I've always thought people who 'share' their music with the world should close their windows, until I got this wonderful sunroof . . . now, I TRY to remember to cut the volume when I turn into the parking lot or cruise past a hospital zone.

When my last car had tunes I did get caught loudly singing along to the Beastie Boys, Let's Get Buck Naked and F&*K. Ooops.

Mary - listening to a book on shuffle, you done made me LOL!

I didn't think my 95-year-old mother could hear Eminen all the way from my study to her bedroom. She could. "Did you pay money for that?" she asked when she walked in. Pays her back for playing Bing Crosby ballads endlessly when I was little.

Asylum Street Spankers' "Shave 'em Dry." The video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5JoDfi2KFk

An unexpurgated version by Lucille Bogan got me busted in the parking lot waiting for my ecclesiastical council to begin in Cambridge. Said I thought it was gospel music. Didn't even hear the words. Just liked the music. They didn't buy it. Must've heard me singing along. Seen me dancing. All that.

Gaylin, so glad to provide laughs. To err is human, after all, and I often have cause to remember that.

Thanks, guys! Now I don't feel so strange about getting busted by my playlist and car dancing!

Great stories!

Oh, Mandy. You came and you gave without taking....

Dear Hubby is baffled how his wife can like Van Halen AND Barry Manilow. He says it is a crime against nature.

. I know every word of every song, and can sing it with exactly the same inflection poor, starved-to-death Karen warbled... I can almost always find something to crank up the speakers for, morning and evening, and since I'm in the office the rest of the time, no biggie.

Hmmm, look how creative spambot 'web design Landon' is--quoted Karen in Ohio and me in the same made-up post. Fancy.

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