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July 03, 2010

Twenty Questions

By Cornelia Read



Reed_fourth_july

Yes, it's only the THIRD of July, but I'm still put in mind of the game my mom used to play whenever faced with a large group of bored children--Twenty Questions.

That's because the first of these questions she'd put to the group was always the following:

1. Is there a Fourth of July in England?

Fourth-of-july

If you're feeling brave (or like a bored child--which is the way I feel most of the time, actually,) answer me that in the comments--and the other nineteen to follow.

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister?

Tombstone

3. The value of two contemporary American coins equals fifty-five cents. One of them is NOT a nickel. What are the two coins?

1921-07-Boys-Life-Norman-Rockwell-cover-Fourth-of-July-400

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill?

Matrix-red-blue-pills
 

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight?


Postcarde
 

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear?


Eskimo_pie
 

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have?

Malibu-fourth-of-july 


8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen?

286Color_150x480-714046
 

9. How many birthdays does the average person have?

20090703-flagcake
 

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first?

459932524_7c2d2ba439
 


11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?

American+hippie+bus
 

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?

2637666266_ecb331c44a
 

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960?

1960_Anon_Kennedy
 

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow?

BaseballTrainat550px
 

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark?

Noahs_ark
  

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide?

Shovels-set-up
  

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"?

Red-telephone_sm
 

18. How far can a dog run into the woods?

American Dog
 

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come?

1960_half_dollar_rev
 

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?

PretzelAmericanFlag3
 

Here's a bonus question:


21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.

The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "Nope. 9:42 express."

4thofjulycat
 

Explain his answer.


If you want to play, copy the questions into your comment:

For ease of answering if you want to play, here are the questions for cutting and pasting without pictures:


1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England?

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister?

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins?

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill?

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight?

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear?

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have?

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen?

9. How many birthdays does the average person have?

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first?

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960?

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow?

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark?

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide?

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"?

18. How far can a dog run into the woods?

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come?

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?

Here's a bonus question:


21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.


The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"


The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

 


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Comments

Oh, man, I need some coffee first. (Although I think I *have* celebrated the 4th like Malibu-----with a bad sunburn!)

These trick questions made me smile, Cornelia. Especially #2. Got them all except for #18 and #21. Can't spot the fallacy in #18 and have tried pronouncing "Manx cat" with every accent I can, but have to admit defeat. That's going to be worrying me all day, darn it!

Nancy, I can't figure out if that guy's name is Malibu, or if they're referring to the entire town. Could go either way.

Margaret, I'll put all the answers up at the end of the day, but I think they'll all get answered. And good for you for getting so many--the Manx cat one took me three days, the first time I heard it.

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? -Yes but it is not a holiday.

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? No he is already dead.

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins?- A 50 piece and a nickel.

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill?

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight?- all some just have more

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? - White

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? - Two

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? -12

9. How many birthdays does the average person have?
- one a year

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? - The match

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?- Me

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?-No one Peacocks don't lay eggs peahens do.

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960?

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? No smoke the train is electric.

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark? -one of each

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? -none it is a hole.

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"? -20%

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? HAlf way then he is running out.

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? The beggar is her sister.

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?
The rope isn't tied at the other end.
Here's a bonus question:


21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.


The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"


The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

This was fun. Thanks.

Here's my try - I missed four, plus the cat.

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? THERE IS A 4TH OF JULY EVERWHERE

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? IF SHE'S A WIDOW, THE GUY IS DEAD

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins? A 50 CENT PIECE AND A NICKEL - ONE COIN ISN'T A NICKEL, BUT THE OTHER ONE IS

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill? 10:00

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight? ALL OF THEM

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? WHITE - YOU'RE AT THE NORTH POLE

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? TWO - THE ONES YOU JUST TOOK

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? 12

9. How many birthdays does the average person have? ONE A YEAR

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? THE MATCH

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver? GOT ME

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg? NOBODY - PEACOCKS DON'T LAY EGGS, PEAHENS DO

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960? EISENHOWER

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? THERE IS NO SMOKE, IT'S ELECTRIC

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark?

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? NO DIRT IN THE HOLE, YOU TOOK IT OUT

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"?

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? HALF WAY - THEN HE'S RUNNING OUT OF THE WOODS

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? THE BEGGAR IS FEMALE

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?

Here's a bonus question:


21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.


The man looks asks the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"


The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

Not enough Monty Python, Haven't figured out 21.

Mr. Eisenhower was president in 1960. Mr. Kennedy was elected in 1960, but now sworn in until 1961.

Every one has one birthday. After that you celebrate the anniversary of that day. (With CAKE! Save me a slice.)


Have a good holiday everybody.

Oh, crap - now I feel stupid.

Oh Cornelia, if I had time I would take this but I just stopped by on my way to work and I'm not yet conscious :o) However...I love these things! Thanks so much for the weekend brain teaser. Happy 4th all!

Love these! I got them all but the last one. It had better not take me 3 days, or it is going to be a very long weekend in this house.

I think it has something to do with the X.

Happy 3rd of July, everyone! There were a couple of years when we had our Pittsburgh fireworks on the 3rd to save money (no holiday pay for city workers) and some of the municipalities have kept the tradition. So it's light up weekend here!

What fun! I needed help on the bear and the dog, but I do know how many animals of each sex Moses took onto the Ark. None. Moses didn't have an Ark; Noah did!

Still trying to figure out the Manx Cat.

Yeah, this was fun, and I got them all, except for 21, which I couldn't figure out (but understand after I Googled it--I didn't have the background knowledge to get it.) To be fair, though, I think I've seen all or almost all of these before.

That was fun I got some obvious ones wrong. But I love these things.

Ummm....what?

Okay, guys, you're all brilliant. Google "manx cat" and check out some images. That's all I'm sayin'....

Okay, here goes . . .

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? YES

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? HE'S DEAD

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins? DON'T KNOW

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill? 10?

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight? ALL OF THEM

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? WHITE

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? TWO

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? 12

9. How many birthdays does the average person have? ONE

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? THE MATCH

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver? MY NAME

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg? DON'T KNOW

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960? DWIGHT

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? NO SMOKE

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark? NONE. MOSES WASN'T ON THE ARK

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? NONE

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"? DON'T KNOW

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? HUH?

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? THE BEGGAR IS A WOMAN

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible? DON'T KNOW

Here's a bonus question:

21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.

The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

NO IDEA

I love you illustrations! I'm not going to look at other comments until I try my answers -- I remember many of these from the days when I used them to engage bored junior high students -- Thanks for entertaining my inner child!


1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? Yes!

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? no, he's dead

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins?
one is NOT a nickel -- half dollar . The other is a nickel.

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill? 10 a.m.

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight? All

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? White -- polar bear at North Pole

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? 2

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? 12

9. How many birthdays does the average person have? one (unless you count being "re-born")

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? match

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?
Mary

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg? peacock is male

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960? I like Ike

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? to the west

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark? one of each sex

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? none

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"? none - unlisted

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? halfway, then running out

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? beggar is woman's sister

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible? rope is not tied to anything

Here's a bonus question:

21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.

The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."
I have no idea, but love the photo.

Got me with Moses -- going for more coffee now. Someone's book kept me up late last night. Love Maisie Dobbs, love good writing, love careful editing!!

Got me with the train, too -- and still thinking about that Manx cat.
. . . and I really want directions for that cake!! ;-)

Just Googled, and the first hit is this Blog -- it's like something from the Twilight Zone . . . .

I missed 3 but haven't had enough caffeine yet. will go back to them in awhile.
I got 21 and LOL, but then, I have a sick sense of humor (and 4 cats, which are distracting me cause they want to be fed!)
Have to copy & send to Bob (before he's had a pot of coffee! bwahaha!)

Mary, go to
www.bnd.com lifestyles, food.
They have recipe & directions for that cake. I thought it sounded interesting but they didn't have a damn picture of it! I gotta have a visual!
Finally! A July 4th cake that isn't strawberries & blueberries !

LMAO! Google IOCHFTS and it leads you to TLC too!

Mr. Typepad ditched my answer. A clear sign I've been talking too much lately! Great fun, Cornelia, thanks! Happy 4th!

On question #6 you could also ask what season of the year it is.

Okay, Cornelia. I just found that Punch cartoon. Very clever. I never would have got it on my own even though you showed a long-tailed cat.

Margaret, AWESOME!!! You totally win on that Manx one...

You guys are so smart. These made me gnash my teeth for days when I first heard them from Mom--especially the "four southern exposures" one. And the Manx was WAY worse.

OK, I knew what a Manx cat was, but I didn't get it until just now. I didn't have to google, though. Ha!

I will be manx cat-ting all day, and I looked at the images. I'm slow this Saturday morning, but really fun. Missed the rope one-duh...

I figured out the 50-cent question, felt smart, and quit while I was ahead. I am deeply impressed by the collective intelligence exhibited here!

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? of course


2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? nope, he's dead

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins? a fifty cent piece and a nickle. one isn't a nickle, but the other one is

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill? 10 AM

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight? 12

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? White-you're at the North POle

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? the two I took

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? a dozen (12)

9. How many birthdays does the average person have? you're only born once

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? the match

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver? Mary Lynn

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg? The peacock didn't lay the egg, someone else's pea HEN laid the egg

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960? Eisenhower

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? Electric trains don't produce smoke

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark? none---moses was a long way from the ark

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? no dirt in the hole

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"? zero, unlisted means NOT in the directory

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? half way, the rest is running out

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? begger is womans sister

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible? the rope isn't tied to anything

Here's a bonus question:


21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.


The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"


The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."
cat is tailless.man is inquiring if it is the cat breed that is tailless. Ticket agent says no, the tail was lost by a train running over it. (the 9:42 express)

You guys are all SERIOUSLY AMAZINGLY BRILLIANT. Seriously.

Mary Lynn, way to go on the manx thing, and Laura in PA too!!

The only one people are still kind of missing is the one about the President's name. I probably should have said 1970, instead.

This is fun. Thank you.

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? Of course, there's a 4th everywhere.

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? If he has a widow, then he is dead.

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins? But the other one is. So a 50¢ piece and a nickel.

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill? 10am

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight? ALL have 28.

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? brown or black.

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? Two

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? 12

9. How many birthdays does the average person have? one per year

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? The room is dark, you'd light the match.

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver? My name since I am the driver.

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?
Peacock's are male so don't lay eggs.

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960? Ike

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? No smoke, electric train.

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark? Can't find the catch in this one. one of each?

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? None, it's a hole.

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"? Unlisted numbers are not in the phone book.

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? Once he is in the woods, he is already there.

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? Cause she's her sister.

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible? The rope is not tied to anything.

Here's a bonus question:

21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.

The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express." ??????

Love these! Cornelia, you are such a hoot.
Manx cat.. no tail... Oh. Ouch?

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England? Yes, they have a July 4 everywhere.

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? No, cuz he's dead.

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins? A 50-cent piece and a nickel (it's the OTHER coin).

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill? 10 a.m.

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight? All of them.

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear? White (unless the oil spill doesn't get cleaned up!)

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have? Two.

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen? A dozen (12).

9. How many birthdays does the average person have? One. The rest are anniversaries of their birth.

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first? The match.

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver? Gayle (that's ME!)

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg? No one. Peacocks are boys. Peahens lay eggs.

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960? Dwight Eisenhower

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow? Electric trains don't smoke.

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark? Noah was on the ark, not Moses.

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide? None.

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"? None. I can't find unlisted numbers in the phone book.

18. How far can a dog run into the woods? Halfway. Then he runs out of the woods.

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come? The beggar is her sister.

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible? The rope isn't tied to anything, except the horse.

Here's a bonus question:

21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.
The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"
The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express." THE CAT LOST ITS TAIL ON THE TRACK WHEN THE EXPRESS WENT BY (MANX CATS ARE BORN WITHOUT TAILS).

Here's one for YOU, Cornelia - do you pronounce the capital of Kentucky "Lewis-ville" or "Louie-ville"?

Happy 4th!

Oh! Is the answer for the President one supposed to be that his name was the same then as it is now? But yeah, 1970 would've worked better. Obama was born in 1961, lol.

HaHa, Gayle -- too funny!
You've reminded me of an out-of-town speaker at Our Lady of the Snows asking, "Do you pronounce this state Missou-reee or Missou-rah. In fairness, she had flown in to the Lambert/St. Louis Airport and when she crossed the Mississippi was probably too distracted by the Arch . . . .

That was a really cool quiz, Cornelia! I missed some really obvious ones (like Moses not being Noah and an electric train not blowing smoke) but had a lot of fun. Thanks for the Saturday chuckles!

umm, the pills.... wouldn't the answer be 90 minutes?
Just cause the doctor gave them to you at 9am doesn't mean you took one then

spoiler alert:

I pronounce the capitol of Kentucky Frankfort.

If a plane crashes on the border between the US and Canada, where do you bury the survivors?/

Stop digging Mary Lynn -- survivors hate to be buried!

and Rita, my doctor would want the pills to be taken right away -- unless of course, one had to go to the pharmacy first, but it didn't say that . . .

Cornelia, I LOVE YOUR BLOGS!

Rita said: "umm, the pills.... wouldn't the answer be 90 minutes? Just cause the doctor gave them to you at 9am doesn't mean you took one then"

Er, not quite. If you don't take the first one right away at 9, the most you can say is that the 3rd pill would be taken *60* minutes after the first one (not 90). Pill one - 30 minutes - pill two - 30 minutes - pill three.

And I also finally got the Manx cat one, even though I knew from the beginning they didn't have tails. Doh!

Here's the official answer key, you guys:

1. Do they have a Fourth of July in England?

Yes, it comes between the third and the fifth.

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister?

If he has a widow, he's dead. So no it's not legal.

3. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins?

One's a fifty cent piece, the OTHER one is a nickel.

4. At nine a.m., your doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take them thirty minutes apart. What time is it when you take the third pill?

Sixty minutes later--ten a.m.

5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight?

ALL of them!

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear?

White. You're at the North Pole.

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have?

Two, you just took them.

8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen?

12.

9. How many birthdays does the average person have?

One.

10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first?

You'd light the match first...

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?

You are the bus driver. What's your name?

12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?

Peacocks don't lay eggs. That would be the peahen's bailiwick.

13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960?

It would've been Barack Obama, but he hadn't been born yet.

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow?

Electric trains don't have smoke--if you're lucky.

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark?

None--Moses didn't have an ark.

16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide?

None. It's a hole.

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"?

None, they're unlisted.

18. How far can a dog run into the woods?

Halfway, then he's running OUT of the woods.

19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come?

She's her sister.

20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?

The rope is only tied to the horse.

Here's a bonus question:

21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.

The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

The cat wasn't born tailless, like a Manx cat. Its tail was cut off by the 9:42 Express.

YOU GUYS ARE WONDERFUL!!!!

Oh! I just now "got" the cat one! lol! Not nice to laugh, I know. :)

Got most of them! BUt Manx cat doesn't have a tail. The man is asking if that was the breed of cat...the ticket seller is saying 'no, he lost his tale when the 9:42 express ran over it." It only took me ten minutes of thinking it over. :-D

Thanks for the laugh Miss C. Loved the questions... Happy 4th everybody...

Marianne

I just want to know where you got that picture of Malibu ...

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