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May 15, 2009

Enough Already

Enough Already

By Kathy Sweeney

This week marks the end of the television season for many shows.  It may also signal my newest boycott of TV.  Why?  I can't take it.  It seems like every station has some idiot getting all ramped up about something moronic.

Enough already.  I've got some new guidelines.

Blog beauty pageant 1.  Enough already with the Beauty Pageants.  Not kidding here.  I cannot believe people are still pretending these things are anything but the superficial and commercial glorification of the medically-altered female form.  At the very least, make these mannequins stop saying words.  Where are all those people who worked so hard to get Playboy out of the grocery stores?  Oh - and the pageants with the little girls in the cathouse makeup?  Grotesque.

2.  Enough already with equating gay marriage with anything other than the legal union of two consenting adults.  You may not think it's a good idea, but that doesn't mean you can compare it to a crime against a child or an animal.

3.  Enough already with Lindsay Lohan.  If there is such a dearth of actual news that you, as a reporter, feel compelled to discuss the scale of messiness of her room, it's time to call it a day.  

4.  Enough already with the royal families.  I don't care what Prince Harry, redheaded wearer of Nazi Halloween Costumes, is doing this weekend.  I don't care what the new crown prince of Couldn't-find-it-on-a-mapistan looks like.  One may recall that we tried the whole monarchy trip.  It sucked.

5.  Enough already with the awful season finales that might actually be series finales that would make me CRAZY.  I'm looking at you, Private Practice.  And Grey's Anatomy - really?!  Both? On the other hand - Lost - as always, blew me away.  

Star-trek-movie 6.  Enough already with the hard-core Trekkies bitching about the new movie.  Yes, there are inconsistencies from the TV show(s).  It's called fantasy.  I hate to break it to you, but this ain't actual history.  Unless you'd like the whole shootin' match to become completely obscure and meaningless to the next generation of movie and TV watchers, leaving you with fewer and fewer live denizens for your Cons, get with the program.  

7.  Enough already with euphemisms for torture.  An enhanced interrogation technique is eating too much garlic before you question someone in a small unventilated room.  Simulated drowning and throwing people against walls like it's a human handball tournament?  Torture.  You may think it's a valid national security strategy. So Be It.  But stop pretending it's something it is not. Which leads to my favorite quote of the week:

Jesse Ventura is a former Governor, studio wrestler and Navy SEAL.  He can also be a whack. Nevertheless, the guy does have some experience most of these pro-torture people do not.  He underwent waterboarding as part of his SEAL training.  Granted, it was in a controlled environment.  Even so, here's what he has to say about using it and getting valid information:

"I'll put it to you this way, you give me a water board, Dick Cheney and one hour, and I'll have him confess to the Sharon Tate murders."

Ahhh, I feel better.  Now you can tell the rest of us - had enough of something?

By the way - I'll be gone all day helping out at the Penn Writers Conference in Pittsburgh.  I'm counting on all of you to keep the discussion going, okay?


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I've had enough of friggin' Twitter. Jesus, you'd think it was Great Literature or Vital Breaking News, instead of short half formed thoughts about crap you really don't care about or updates on what somebody had for lunch.

I'm tired of whiney bitchy got nothing to offer except obstruction Republican politicians and Rightie talk show goobs. You lost, so shut the fuck up already.

I'm tired of vampires in whatever media they pop up in. They are dead things that suck blood to live. No matter how pretty and cool you dress 'em up, they are still gross.

I'm tired of America's Most Talented Singing & Dancing Idols. Most of these folks will be obscure trivia answers in 5 years, so I can't understand why millions of people nut up over them every week.

I'm tired of people referring to any possible climate based catastrophy as "the end of the world". As the great George Carlin once said, "The world isn't going anywhere. WE might be fucked, but the world will go right along without us."

Also, I second what Kathy said about the whineyassed Trekkies.

Uh-oh, someone is on a rampage. Thank goodness somebody said it! I agree with everything, so far, including the vampires.

I'd pay good money to see Cheney get waterboarded. It's the least he deserves.

Doc, I'm with you on Twitter. It ain't the Second Coming, that's for sure.

And mostly, I'm fed up with not being able to sleep. It stinks.

I'm tired of all the US based reality shows that focus on the absolute worst, competitive, petty, manipulative, self-centered, cruel behaviour in US citizens. Hey I have met Americans - you are not like that. Why the hell is it so popular to embrace and idealize it on TV.

I am tired of the judges on reality shows (tape them, watch the talent, skip the judges). Do they have to be so manic, weird, down-right mean, pompous and on and on. Whatever happened to constructive criticism?

I agree with Doc, I remember a line from a Sci-Fi book, that said "we are not killing the planet, we are killing our ability to live on the planet".

I object to your second item. What Violet and I have is very deep and heartfelt, and when we are allowed to get married, we intend to take that walkie down the aisle. Now, some might consider it immoral for us to marry because Violet has been spayed and so we Josh-Violet litters would be out of the question, but I suppose we could adopt, maybe even from a rescue organization or homeless shelter.

Oh, I am fed up with my wife and in-laws for reasons that would be TMI here, even for me. And that's saying something.

Awesome. Amen on everything you said, Kathy.

Doc, thank you, thank you, thank you for the vampire thing. I have never read a vampire book. I will never read a vampire book. (OK, except for the one that appeared in one of Nora Roberts' trilogies.) Stop trying to make me. They're gross.

However, I am addicted to Dancing With The Stars, so I'll bow out of that one. (Go, Gilles!)

Oh, and I would also like to give a heartfelt thanks to whomever on this blog recommended Louise Penny's Inspector Gamache books at some point. I LOVE them.

I'm really quite tired of people being asked for their OPINIONS, and if those opinions don't follow the Party Line, vilification follows.

Not even going to touch those who believe, and will be happy to educate you, from their ivory towers or safe suburb, that there ARE rules in a knife fight.

REALLY tired of those who claim Christianity yet when some things are questioned (see the famous 'Letter to Dr. Laura' as one example) shake their heads, sigh, and sadly say, "I feel sorry for you...you just don't get it." No, I get it enough to ask for explanations to the contradictions.

I third Kathy and Doc's sentiment about the Trekkies. "They RUINED it!" No, they didn't. Go to the DVD store, it's still there, intact.

Phony lead-ins to Season Finales. I don't apologize, I was hooked on ABC's CASTLE from premiere. Commercials and ads for the finale made it QUITE clear it was Rick Castle who'd been shot, not the FBI Agent/ex-fiancee of Beckett. The cheapest of cheap shots.

Authors who discover the Young Adult market and then re-write the canon they've created over thirty years. The newest is CHASING THE BEAR: A YOUNG SPENSER NOVEL, supposedly by RBP himself. First, two major pieces of Spenserian History are re-done; one in the name of Political Correctness (okay, sad but true, we could go with that), the other for who knows why, but then a 14 year old Spenser commits cold-blooded murder, and gets away with it because the guy he kills is a Known Bad Guy. Can't have a 14 year old boy in a bar drinking scotch with his father, but killing a man is okay. Sheesh.

Sorry. I'm heading for the coffee pot right now....

Oh, William, I'm with you. The young Spenser--that's SO wrong. And I'm so over hypocrites who talk one way and act the polar opposite.

Seems as though we missed a lot of finales last week, when we didn't watch a single TV show. Rats.

I'm fed up with the state of my lawn, but I have neither the desire/knowledge to fix it myself, nor the money to have someone else do it.

I'm tired of being told at every turn that everything I eat, drink, do, or don't do is going to result in imminent suffering and/or death.

Enough already with the conspiracy theories. (The whack-job ones, I mean, like the nutsos who say the Holocaust never happened.)

And .... will I be banned from TLC forever if I confess I just turned in a proposal for a vampire series? (Does it help that my vamps aren't dead? And that I think the whole blood thing is icky, too?)

That's the spirit!

Have I mentioned lately how much I love our TLC community?

Off to Penn Writers to help set up! I'll be there most of the weekend, so I'll have to check in to keep up with all this fun!

I agree with all of this - except Josh's family, cuz I don't know them.

William Simon, I LOVE Castle as well. I watched the promos on fast forward and thought the same thing. The ending did grab you though, didn't it? I don't watch TV trailers or promos anymore for that reason. DVR's and FF rule in our house!

Not being a Trekkie, but having watched the original series, I have to say I love the new movie. And I agree with you, Kathy.

Wow, you've all been pretty much inhabiting my house and listening to my bitch (or my head) which is kinda creepy. And I loved the quote from Jesse Ventura. Cheney being waterboarded, now that's something I'd pay to watch.

I'm fed up with the people a block over who have an entire yard full of barking dogs.

Soooo....I live in a bubble. The voice on the Metrorail sounds like the person narrating Logan's Run.
I've had enough with traffic and the idiots who make it so miserable. Let's conclude driving anywhere outside my bubble is torture. I've had enough of trying to get the gas cap off my car at the service station and pumping my own gas and checking my own levels.
I've had enough of ANY government agency. Social Security, Driver's Licence, Passport People and Unemployment Services are just the worst organized and run places in the world!
Andy Roonie says there is only 2 reasons to give your opinion. 1, In a life threatening situation. 2, When you are asked. I think we should add a third one. 3, When you are getting paid.
And then there is one of my personal pet peaves - men who tie their sweaters around their necks and women who tie their sweat shirts around their waist. Where did that come from? Victims of Fashion!
I'm returning to my bubble now.
I must have had a bowl of Crabby Appletons for breakfast this morning.
Just saying.

What about the Bones season finale last night. I must admit I have no life at the moment and I was looking forward to the show - but it was a very stupid not put together show. It was a Turkey!!

I'm feeling the season finale promotions. They do it all the time, and it's blatant false advertising.

I'll raise your gay marriage thing with enough already about the focus on Adam Lambert being the "first openly gay potential American Idol winner", and all interviews with him asking how he feels about that. WHY DOES IT POSSIBLY MATTER?

Also, enough already with the networks purposely scheduling shows to run two minutes over or start two minutes late, just to f*ck with my dvr recording schedule. I guess they'd rather I didn't watch the show at all if I'm not watching it live.

PS - I love Castle!

First..I too love Castle (and for all the wrong reasons of course)!
Enough already of hiding rudeness behind a cell-phone. If you're coming to my store to ask me a question or buy my product, please give me the courtesy of your full attention...I promise it will only deprive you of the item attached to your ear for a few moments.
And what happened to 'thank you'?
Oh yeah...and people texting while driving. I have enough problems with people applying mascara or adjusting their child's safety seat while driving. If it's THAT important, take the damn time to do it before getting in moving traffic.
And everything else you all said! Thanks for letting me vent before work...we're re-setting the store and believe me, that's an Excedrin headache waiting to happen!
Happy Friday all :o)

Enough already...with people dumping their unwanted pets. Gads. I was adopted by a stray cat on New Year's Day. Blessed with two kittens on March 29th, and two more on March 31st. Now to finish the new home selections and getting her spayed. (love my vet...he is going to give me a discount since I am just carrying on the family tradition. LOL!)

kris...I haven't been banned yet for reading vamp books, although I am picky about what is involved in them. Nothing too weird or gross, please. :)

I saw an ad for a reality show last night in which people - viewers - could vote on how to torture contestants in Costa Rica.


Debby, no weirdness or grossness at all, I promise. Just nice normal everyday people who need a nip every few months so they don't go banzai.

Karen, why aren't you sleeping?
Right now, my list is headed up by Sears -- bad products, bad service -- a friend at the library told me Sears has been bought by KMart "abandon hope."

1. Criminals as media stars (Drew Peterson, anyone?)

2. Trying to find a parking place in between SUV behemoths parked across more than their share.

3. The news as "entertainment product."

Wow, you've pretty much covered it all! From the weird, fantasy Bones episode (after 10 mins, I went out back & watched the bats swoop around, made more sense!)to the non- reality shows.
Enough of that shit already! Give me shows with a plot!
um, the only rule I ever heard about knife fights is to bring a gun!

Groan, the texting-while-driving gives me a massive headache! What could possibly be so important that you take both hands AND eyes off the road? It's bad enough there are so many people driving around with one hand and zero attention already, just talking. I can't tell you how many times I/we have nearly been creamed near expressway on-ramps by drivers merging onto the highway without looking because they were on the phone. It's appalling.

Mary, I never sleep, but it's getting worse lately, probably because of pollen and mold right now. It would make me seriously crabby, except that I'm re-reading Sweet Love, for our book club on Sunday! I'm enjoying it even more the second time, and can't wait to hear what my book group thinks of it.

Could they please cancel Extreme Home Makeover. The ridiculous houses they build, give me a break. Most are completely out of touch with the families practical needs, over done for the neighbourhood. And really a 10 or 12,000 sq ft house with no spare bedroom? And all those weeping and moaning fake contractor types. Ugh. And the progressively worse diseases, circumstances etc. And they excruciatingly themed rooms! You know most of those kids are going to grow out of their fairy/dragon/flower/motocross rooms before the show actually airs.
And Ty Pennington - shut the F up already.
I wonder if they will continue to use Sears if Walmart has bought them.

I agree with everything everyone says (except for Josh and Violet...that seems so wrong on so many levels...why would Violet settle for Josh? LOL...just kidding Josh...really).

As far as TV is concerned, IMO it has become so bad that I don't even watch it any more. If I do want to see a show (and the only one is Bones), I'll look at it on hulu.com through Comcast's Fancast. I'm also over people who are celebrities just because they are attention whores!

Josh, I really am kidding. You're laughing, right?

How's this for an "enough, already?"

Back in early March, I ordered a DVD through Amazon marketplace. The estimated delivery date came & went. No DVD.

Contacted them, they verified my address, said, whoops, don't know what happened, but we'll send out another. Okay.

Another estimated delivery date came & went. I looked at some new reviews of their service on Amazon, saw that others were having orders, and canceled the order. My refund was issued right away.

Guess what showed up in my mailbox today? And no, it wasn't lost in the mail. It was just sent MAY 11 - at least 10 days after I canceled the order. So now I have to find out how to pay them AGAIN, because I still want it, and my conscience won't let me just keep the damned thing.


Oh, well, Kris. My husband was trying to buy a $5,000 camera on eBay. He came rushing in one day, ordering me to write a check to some sketchy name, right that minute, so he could get it in the mail, so he could get the camera on time for a project. It didn't come, didn't come, so we stopped payment. Then the guy calls and says the check bounced (duh), and he can't order the camera until he gets paid. Take the stop off. He orders the camera, from CHINA. In the meantime, he still does not cash the check (I'm watching online). The camera does not arrive in time, so we stop payment again, since we no longer need it (the guy knew there was a time element).

THEN the camera arrives from China. It turns out to be an El Cheapo that sells for $400 in the States. Upshot: Hubby is forbidden to order anything online ever again.

I need a martini.

Karen, I don't have martinis. but I make a wicked summertime slushie, and boy, I'm thinking this is the day. They'll be ready in a few hours - probably about when you'd get here, if you start driving now.

I love you, Kathy Sweeney.

OK I've had enough of these mfsob storms & tornados!!!! The weathermen should have SAG cards for as much air time as they're getting, screwing up my shows! grrrrrrrr

Kris, I think you are entitled to keep the DVD -- pain & suffering, general aggravation. If they disagree, they can contact you.

I sent a wonderfully scathing e-mail to Sears, but still the best they would offer is an a.m. "window" Monday morning. If things don't go well Monday, I'm thinking of a letter to the Sears/KMart holding company . . .and a trip to Target to buy a new microwave. . .

Stop the world-I want to get off for awhile.Saw a guy in the grocery store with a shirt on that said, "I don't discriminate----I hate everybody." Yikes.
How about using the time spent on talking about Miss Queen USA's breast implants to educating women about IBC which is inflammatory breast cancer which has no lumps and can't be seen on a mammogram. It is a rash. Please google it NOW.

If anyone wants to see old shows of Howdy Doody, call me. I have the info you are looking for.now, that was a show

Ciao----just keep laughing.I am remembering the first version of "colored television." It was a colored screen you TAPED over the screen. So, as you can see, television has been as the kids say, "More worser.".

I do agree with you that it’s enough of the same kind of shows that we are going on seeing at the television. You seem to have quite a long list of "enough s".

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