No More Material Girl

No More Material Girl

by Michele

No, this isn't a blog about Madonna, and I don't care whether or not she's sleeping with A-Rod.  It's my own material habits I'm interested in today, and yours. 

I don't know about you, but I find I'm shopping for fun a lot less these days.  And it's not just that I don't live in New York anymore, because I can do plenty of damage from the comfort of my computer.  Did you ever notice that Saks and Neiman Marcus had their websites designed by the same company?  I did.  That's how much time I used to log "window shopping" on-line when I should have been working.  But no more.

The last time my shopping frequency took a nosedive this major was when the recession in the early 90s coincided with the start of the Gulf War.  The first section of the New York Times has all the pretty advertisements for luxury goods -- the jewels, the Chanel handbags, the gorgeous shoes.  I'd read the front page and feel just sick from all the bad news.  The housing slump, the terrible economy, the awful war.  Then I'd turn the page and see those ads and they'd look absolutely obscene.  The news this time around is worse, and those ads are looking that much more wrong.  Even if I can still afford to shop, I don't want to.  I might need that money for a rainy day.  I guess that's what they call a decline in consumer confidence.

It seems not everybody feels the way I do.  The economy is falling apart, yet luxury goods retailers like Louis Vuitton are doing better than ever.  How can this be?  I just happen to be reading a cute book that sheds some light on women with the truly insane shopping gene -- Michael Tonello's Bringing Home the Birkin, a memoir about a makeup artist who moves to Barcelona on a whim and ends up selling his designer wardrobe on EBay to pay his rent.  He stumbles into the rarefied world of super-rich women who live to hunt the "Birkin" -- a particular handbag made by Hermes which has a two- or three-year waiting list.  He ends up making his living buying and reselling the things.   

  I know it's difficult to believe, but a "starter" Birkin is $7000 in the store, and authentic Birkins fetch anywhere from $10K to 100K on EBay depending on how rare they are.  Yes, TODAY someone will be paying that kind of money for a handbag.

I'd like to propose that we all go back to satisfying our material needs like we did when we were kids, by collecting innocent, inexpensive -- even free -- things.

                                                            

My older son for a time collected the pins they give you when you visit the Metropolitan Museum in New York. They're just a little round piece of tin with the Met's trademark "M" symbol stamped on them, but he loved the fact that every day the pin was a different color.  He'd beg me to go to the museum and use our membership card to gain admission, so we could get a pin for him and one for me (to give to him for the collection, of course).  Then we'd spend ten minutes or so scouring the floors in the Great Hall for M pins that people had dropped.  The art -- not so much.  It was about the pins.  He had a huge bag full of them in every color, with the rarest colors being the most prized.

My younger son will collect anything -- buttons, stones, medals from any war or replicas of said medals, any type of card (Pokemon, baseball, something completely random), small plastic figures of animals, bright shiny pennies, you name it.  When I was a kid, I used to collect toothpaste caps, wash them out and make sets of glassware for my Barbie dolls to use at their tea parties.  Finishing the toothpaste tube was a moment of great satisfaction, as great as anybody ever had over a silly handbag.

Comments

[William Simon]

Nicely said, Michele, and something that's on everyone's minds these days, I bet.

7K for a handbag? ONE handbag? I'll skip the usual jokes about what that handbag (or the sales clerk) better do for me at that price....

[Joyce Tremel]

I feel guilty spending fifteen dollars for a new handbag when I have perfectly good ones in my closet. Imagine the guilt when I spent fifty for a Vera Bradley bag in April. But $7000? That's obscene. Even if I had the money to buy it, I couldn't do it.

[Josh]

We collect things like hotel soap similar amenities. If you stay more than one day, you can collect a full set, and then when we have company, we can put out a full set of, say, Greenbriar soap, shampoo, shoe cloth, shower hat (is that what it's called?), sewing kit, etc. I hope to be able to do that in this place where I am staying, although 22 euro a day for Internet would be pretty steep if I actually had to pay for it. Shit! I better check my company's t&e policy.

[Karen in Ohio]

$7,000 (or more) for a handbag? Never in a million years. All the handbags in the house together didn't cost anything close to that. However, I used to collect sewing machines (have given away or sold all but the ones I use the most), and fabric to sew with. My lifestyle has changed so much that I rarely sew for myself anymore. All those lovely silks and linens have no place in my now-casual life, sadly. I still keep them around to fondle, though.

I still collect pieces of my mother's china pattern whenever I find it, usually at antique malls: http://www.hillhousewares.com/category0maker37pattern1088.html
Isn't it pretty? There are other colors of the same pattern (dove gray, sky blue, and a hideous mustard), but the spruce green was perfect for Christmas and Thanksgiving, and even Easter, which is when we used it in my childhood. Mother gave it to me about 20 years ago, and I even decorated my dining room around the pieces on display. Yesterday I found three pieces at a garden store, of all places. She charged me $8, and threw in a good-sized onion.

The plates of this pattern, by the way, are so small. They're 9" across, but the flat part is less than 7 1/2", so the plate looks full without a lot of food. Most of the plates we have that were made in the last 20 years are much bigger. Interesting, no?

[Elaine Viets]

Good points, Michele. I used to collect sea shells as a kid, but quit when I moved to Florida. More things to dust.

[Nancy Martin]

Karen, I'm trying to break my fabric addiction. Used to be, I had scads of the stuff---mostly upholstery and curtain fabric. Prized possession? 50 yards of Mario Buatta cabbage rose chintz. (Made fabulous curtains 2 houses ago.) I still can't part with it.

I admit to loving handbags, and I invest in one really nice one every year or two. But I like pretty ones. (And never more than a few hundred bucks. I was thrilled to find my favorite Cole Haan bag at TJ Maxx for half price. I bought it and nearly torn my shoulder within a week.--The damn thing is HEAVY! Serves me right, huh? And now Coldwater Creek has a copy for half the price--and half the weight!) I fail to see the attraction in the Birkin bag, though, but I haven't seen it close up. Maybe it's lined with gold?

[ramona]

The Birkin bag is so far removed from the reality of my life, my thought about it runs something like, okay, whatever. I'm not even sure I believe these stories. I think the Birkin bag might be an urban myth.

Has anyone else experienced this: I now find that I am incapable of buying something unless it is on "sale." (Except for food. I never buy food on sale.) I think stores put so much on sale--or pseudo-sale, because 10% off is not really on sale--that I expect every rack to be topped with a markdown.

Or maybe I've just been hanging out at Kohl's and Coldwater Creek too much.

[Nancy Martin]

Hijack! I see Alaskan airports are socked in by volcanic ash.---Wonder if our intrepid Sarah is stuck up there indefinitely??

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080811/us_nm/airlines_alaska_volcano_dc

[mome]

Rocks! I used to collect rocks everywhere I went. Not the rare different kinds but regular rocks from the parking lot. The funny thing is my kids do the same thing and it drives me nuts - as my Father says "Payback is hell!" We were just in Washington DC and my 5 year old insisted on carrying some of the rocks she found on the ground on the Mall 8 blocks to the Metro so she could have them for her "museum". At least it is cheaper than a Birkin Bag! I don't think my entire wardrobe would add up to $7000! Not that I wouldn't enjoy having that much disposable income to blow.....

[Karen in Ohio]

I hear ya, Nancy. That cabbage rose chintz sounds yummy, though.

Since we now have a farm that needed a large window covered, I finally used some chintz that I have had in my sewing room for more than 20 years, along with some ticking stripe (as lining) that I've had for almost as long. It felt so good to make a little room, and to reduce the sun's glare in the dining area at the farm, and to spend zero money doing it.

Ramona, you've caught on to retail's dirty little secret. 40 years ago, a sale was truly a sale. But then in the 1970s retailers began having their merchandise made offshore, at a bargain basement price, and they began putting it into stock at initially inflated prices (ie, more than the traditional keystone, or doubled from wholesale cost). Then they would put the items on "sale", but still higher than the keystone price would have been. Knowing this, I never, ever buy anything for full price in clothing or other soft goods. The bad thing is that retailers have gotten addicted to this sort of business model, and they can't get away from it. So now that the former third world countries like India and China are raising their standards of living, it's costing more to have things made there.

Maybe I'll just hang on to that fabric, come to think of it.

[Nancy Martin]

I collect theater programs, now that I think about it. Every time we see a show, I tuck the program into a box in my office. I added West Side Story over the weekend.--A great production!

[peach]

Fabric Collection-Got one too! It's taking over my limited storage space. Home Dec, Fashion, cottons, holiday themed, vintage I could probably start a fabric store then there's the thread spools I don't even know how many, but I'm guessing 700ish with all the different colors of rayon threads. I'm also a sucker for sewing gadgets to make life easier, which includes around 30 different feet for my sewing machine.

Purses/handbags/pocketbooks: One purse until it falls apart or looks so bad that I have to purchase another. I've never paid more than $40 for a purse. My daughter is the complete opposite. A purse for every season and occasion.

I do have several "collections" of objects, but I'm not obsessive about adding to them. I collect vases. It doesn't matter what type as long as it strikes my fancy. I have glass, earthenware, ceramic, etc.

My rules about collecting:
1. I have to really like an object, be it antique, collectable, or modern.
2. Don't buy it just because it is worth money to someone else.

[peach]

Just read my post and realized that my grammar could be better. Run on sentences and all that!

[Rita Scott]

Nancy & Karen, I am SOOOOOO happy to find out I'm not the only one on here with a fabric addiction! When we moved from home of 16 yrs to the house, I had to organize & pack my various hidden stashes. ended up with 14 large plastic totes of quilting fabric, 5 of the roll around drawer thingies, and 4 large totes of denim! (of course all the cat fabric is for catnip toys & quilts for future grandkids)
But I'm cheap, I think $25 is the most I've ever spent on a purse, and them use them till they fall apart!
When my kids wanted designer jeans I told them 'the day I spend $50 for a pair of jeans, they'll have MY name across the ass!'
Why pay high prices to give a designer free advertising?

[Karen in Ohio]

Rita, I thought it was you who has written about this in the past. Welcome to the club!

A local group collects fabric for projects they use to help with mentally disabled kids, and another group teaches life skills to inner city women struggling to recover from addictions or other problems. I gave each of them a full SUV-load of fabric and other stuff in the last couple of years. Once upon a time I was an editor for an online sewing magazine, and I had an obscene amount of stuff from companies that sent samples, etc. It felt very good to give it to those who really could use it.

[Rita Scott]

When I worked security I found out about 'retail mark-ups'
Marshall's, T J's,& similar stores have a 65% mark -up.
Macy's, Dillard's, & their counterparts have a 350% mark-up!!!!
I don't even want to guess what Nieman's is!!!!

[storyteller Mary]

Peach, your writing was just fine -- clear and to the point. My fingers didn't itch once for a red pen. ;-)
Nancy, a gold-lined bag would be HEAVY! . . .and my bags are always heavy enough with all the "necessities" I feel the need to carry. I use an L.L.Bean microfiber "healthy back" bag, and still set it down every chance I get. They have an unconditional guarantee, too, so if it wears out too fast, they send another. No way I'm spending thousands on a purse.
Books, though, that's my true addiction, and even after giving so many to the Y and the library, I still have full shelves and boxes yet to unpack. I tell people that it's at least a benign addiction, but I am trying to use the library more these days.

[storyteller Mary]

Housing crisis -- I have a sad story from my realtor. He's selling houses for a bank, from a builder that went bankrupt. A client was ready to buy, approved for a loan, but the bank refused. They felt the market isn't finished falling, and the house might become worth less than the mortgage amount, so they wouldn't issue the mortgage on that house. I guess if the buyer had more for the down payment, it might have worked. I suppose it's better to be conservative than as reckless as banks had been, but that would be so disappointing. He says they will just look for a differenct house.

[JanetLynn13]

I collect books, but not all books. Only my favorites. And sea glass. My sea glass collection is nice & small but still has pieces from the Pacific, the Atlantic from Maine to Florida, Lake Erie, and now the Mediterranean. I used to collect seashells, but I have so many that new ones only come home if they are REALLY special.

I don't understand the purse - especially for people so fashion conscience that they change purses with every outfit. That purse really doesn't go with any designer outfit I've seen. The design is more of a working-woman's everyday purse. For someone who understands the value of $7000 and wouldn't pay that for a purse. I just don't get it.... Mine cost under $30, and I use it for a season. After 6 months or so, I'm so sick of it and it's so beat up, that I usually just pitch it.

[Kerry]

Color me clueless, too, about the attraction of that bag. I mean, I *love* purses, totes, handbags, etc., and still don't get it. Never mind the price.

I like all kinds of keepsakes, as long as they're (generally) small and inexpensive, and especially if they're nature themed. I keep most of that stuff, which ranges from a bunch of my father's Lennox birds and other critters to sea shells and fossils to beer bottles with cool labels, in my office. Where it would provide nothing but clutter at home, it provides some nice ice breakers with students.

Janet, I'm a fan of sea glass, too. I have a very small, modest collection, and envy you all the cool places you've collected from!

[ArkansasCyndi]

I have a confession... I have a purse fetish. I love purses. BUT I would NEVER spend 7k for one. NEVER. NEVER. NEVER.

I've been sitting here thinking about collection, and honestly, I collect nothing (other than the heaps of dust throughout my house). My husband says I'm wrong. I collect angels. I don't have a bunch and the angel has to "speak" to me in a certain way but I do look at angels everywhere we go. He says I also collect jewelry. HA!

How fun to see what things people collect. I think it reveals interesting sides to their personalities, don't you?

[michele]

Hi all -- sorry to post so late. I'm actually on vacation in Italy, and it's charmingly Italian here, which means the internet connection we were promised hasn't worked since we arrived, although it's always supposed to work in "one or two days." Honestly, until today when I have a blög to be responsible for, I haven't minded.

At this moment in my life, I've decided to collect experiences. I can't buy anything in Europe except postcards -- too expensive.

I#ll try to check in again later. Sorry for the typos, I'm on German keyboard.

Oh -- interesting about John Edwards, huh? The National Enquirer broke the story and HuffPo made it impossible to ignore. The MSM was way behind the curve!

[Karen in Ohio]

Michele, eat something wonderful for me. I LOVE Italy. Which reminds me of something that I collect, which is coins from all over the world. Luckily, I have some that are no longer used, like lira and francs, deutshe marks, and a bunch that my mother-in-law collected before she died. My grandson will enjoy it when he's older, I hope.

Totally forgot about books, but I've decided to stop buying them unless they're written by a Tart. Love you guys, and wish to support you.

[Karen in Ohio]

Michele, there is some thought that the reason for sitting on the Edwards' story is that revealing his affair would have thrown the primary to Hillary Clinton.

Things that make you go, hmmm.

[SisterZip]

Well, at least Edwards' wife knew about it before it hit the fan. Unlike another wife we remember. Deniability...that is what we strive for our politicians.

As far as $7k purses? Not in this life time. I remember the days my daughter & I would argue about $50 Guess jeans. I flat out refused to pay that much for a pair of jeans "no matter who's name was on its ass". She screeched, "You are ruining my life. I hate you!" Just because I didn't want her looking like those yuppie kidlets she went to school with. Oh, wait! They are now Olympians.

Just a thought...couldn't Ralphie boy let the logo go this one time? Am I the only one who thinks it is tacky as hell to have a 6 in "Polo" logo on the lapel of those blazers?

[SisterZip]

Not lapel...pocket!

Sheesh!

[Nancy Martin]

Great to hear from you, Michele! Hope you are enjoying some Clooney watching!

With my foot up on a desk and my butt in a rolling office chair, I am thinning my book collection today. The dust is incredible, but I'm being ruthless. Reason for pitching hundreds of old mysteries? I need to make space for the hundreds of *new* books piled on the other side of the office!

[mary alice at mystery lovers bookshop]

She who has the most fabric wins!

My sister's mtto and boy does she ever.....for years she volunteered to do principal costumes for The Nutcraker for a local ballet group! That means collecting all the wedding dress samples from Phila main line hops----taking them apart, cleaning and storing for future costumes in luscious fabrics. She used many when she had pregnant lead dancers who needed new costumes every four days!

[Doc in CA]

7 grand for a purse? The first 6 cars I ever owned didn't total that much! People are insane if they pay that much.

As to collecting, oh man, does that hit home. I collect games of all sorts...little plastic dinosaurs, monsters, animals and assorted human figures...cool plants for my garden...theater tickets from every movie I've seen in the last 30 years...dice...and stuffed animals (there goes my macho image).

My wife collects books and a myriad other things. So far, the dogs just collect bellyrubs.

[michael tonello]

thanks so much for mentioning my book, Bringing Home the Birkin. i hope that you enjoyed the read.
be well!
michael~