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April 04, 2008

Peeves and other Irritants

Peeves and Other Irritants

By Rebecca the Bookseller

Blog_grrOops - here it is, about 10 pm on Thursday night, and I just remembered I have to write a blog for tomorrow.

I'm not sure if TLC has ever done a blog on Pet Peeves (I searched the Posts and nothing came up, so I'm hoping this is a new subject) but I certainly have enough to fill a blog, and I'm betting the rest of you do too.

Some of my peeves are small - like the misuse of the word "literally". You hear this from TV pundits and from kids. Example: "I was literally, like, dead." No. You were not.

Then there are the people in service and retail jobs who refuse to make eye contact. Yeah, I see you, and I'm much too big for you to miss me. If you are busy, at least tell me so. Do not pretend I am not STANDING right HERE at your open register/desk/window.

Then there are the people who just refuse to admit they don't know the answer. It's okay to say you don't know. In fact, I'd rather you say: "I don't know if we carry Starbucks Frapps in a bottle." That's better than saying either: "Uh, yeah, they're somewhere over there" accompanied by a general wave, when in fact, they are no where in the store; or "No, we never had them things" when in fact, I just bought some here last week.

And while we're on that subject, I know all the marketing gurus tell the big supermarkets to put the milk in the furthest possible place so you have to wade through aisles of crap and tides of confused people to get to it. I don't care. Put it in the front. If you can fit every candy bar in the universe right there at the register, you can fit a small fridge for milk.

Before we leave the grocery - here's another one. Why do they discontinue the good stuff? I'm talking, of course, about the Oreo ice cream sandwiches (real oreos, real oreo size) and the Oreo brownies. Those things were the best - but they're gone. Instead, we've got reverse Oreos and flavored Oreos (okay, the peanutbutter ones are good). I didn't need more Oreo flavors. I just want my ice cream sandwiches back.

Then there is the laundry detergent - you can't find regular stuff to clean your clothes any more - we've got fifteen scents, and everything added from Downy to Baking Soda to - and I really don't get this one - Mr. Clean. And if you want plain old toothpaste? Give it up. Flavors, sparkles, whiteners, de-sensitizers - I don't even know what some of those chemicals would do to the kitchen floor, let alone my mouth.

Obviously, the grocery is a rich area for peeves, so I'll leave the rest to you guys.

Let's talk about parking. Not that kind, Margie - the kind where you need to find a space to leave your car so you can shop or run an errand, or whatever. I've actually seen people get out of their cars to argue over who has the right to a spot. This would really be none of my business (unless there is an old person, and then they get dibs, period.) But the people block up the entire lane while they hash it out. If you happen to be right behind them, you are totally screwed, because you can't get out. Then there are the buzzard parkers, who just stop right at the front of the lot and wait for someone to leave. They also block traffic. Arrrgh.

Okay, obviously, I could go on all night, but I'll limit it to one more. Cancelled TV shows. Look, I know most of the shows on TV are crap, but every once in a while, I get involved in one, and then - boom! It's gone. Right in the middle of a story line. Hey - if you want to cancel a show, fine - but at least air the remaining episodes! We know damn well you filmed them (this does not apply to the recent writers strike, and if that thing cost me "Private Practice", "The Unit" or "Moonlight", I am going to be pissed). If you don't want to take up precious air time - you know, for a recap or repeat of "Big Brother House #23: The Wrath of the Switched Mom", put them on a DVD and I'll pay for the damn things.

Okay, I need to take some deep, calming breaths so I can at least pretend to prepare to sleep, so I'm handing the baton off to you -- got peeves? I know you do, so let's hear 'em.


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Hopefully. The misuse of "hopefully" bugs me.

Also, when people are referred to as "that." As in: "People that want Oreo ice cream sandwiches back should start a national protest." (It's "People WHO...")

No pet peeves, but I thought I would provide a useful link for those who might like to email people who annoy them.

Warning. It's loud.


My pet peeve is snow.

People who do not use child or infant seats in their cars or do not make their children wear seat belts. Don't they remember the commercial with the eggs in the station wagon?

Motorcycles that pass me by riding 100 mph between lanes when I am passing someone and we are both going at least 60. Also, motorcyclists who do not wear helmets.

People who park the wrong direction at the curb.

Use of "could care less," when the speaker really means, "couldn't care less."

People who do not use their cruise control.

Many business bullshit terms.

Every other person in the world, when I am not properly medicated. As, it seems, would be the case at this moment.

Ramona, I can think of so many uses for that link!!

Love the link, Ramona!
Pet peeves: hmmmm,
The use of the phrase "these ones", instead of "these"; folks who don't pick up their dog's poop in other people's yards; large urban assault vehicle drivers who can't keep the SUVs in the lane or put them in a single parking space; waiters who bring you a diet pepsi when you specifically order a diet coke - nope, it's NOT the same thing; and, people who talk on their cell phones while using public transportation.

Oh Josh - I so agree with Couldn't Care Less! Drives me nuts.

Irregardless - uh, no such word

Text messaging - especially during meals or when they are with other people

I'm sure there's so many more, but I'm heading to Dallas for the weekend. See you guys Monday! Play nice. :)

Irregardless. It's not a word.

People who use the self serve checkout aisle at the grocery store and do not have a clue how to scan their groceries. And they have enough junk in their cart to last for months. So they take a really, really, really long time to find each individual UPC code, scan it slowly, check to make sure the price is correctly displayed, look down at the item again, and finally put it down on the belt. When they finally get to their produce, my head is about to explode.

The Pittsburgh left. It's an accident just waiting to happen everytime someone does it. Turning lane yields to oncoming traffic. That's what I was taught and that's what I practice.

Whatnot. Also not a word.

The ploy used by credit card companies to trick you into signing up for additional services when you call to activate a new card. You actually have to decline these services by pushing a seemingly random series of numbers on your phone, chanting a super secret code, or they are automatically imposed. I recently discovered we've been paying for "identity theft protection" on one of our credit cards which I have no recollection ever authorizing. To the tune of $99! Which I only discovered because I actually was so bored eating lunch one day that I picked up a piece of junk mail that told me the service would be renewed automatically unless I called within 2 days of receiving this piece of mail that looked exactly like the other 800 pieces of junk mail sitting on my kitchen counter destined for the trash. I spent an hour on the phone to straighten it all out.

Check your statements. I'm just saying. Lesson learned.

My pet peeves mostly involve driving. Or, more specifically, the "special people" on the road. The driver who blocks an intersection through three rotations of the light because he started a left turn and cannot complete it because the lane into which he is turning is, in fact, blocked. So there he sits, slanted across all lanes, while the lights change merrily over and over again.

The drivers who believe that the traffic control devices are mere suggestions, and coast through stop signs or speed through yield signs.

The extra special drivers/parkers who misuse handicapped placards.

"Between you and I . . ." or any of its variants (She sent it to John and I . . ., etc.) Arrrrrgh!

My biggest pet peeves are about noise:

People who play their car stereos so loudly that they have to roll the windows down to keep said windows (and their own heads) from exploding from the percussive bass, with the result that, even with my own windows up, I can't hear my own (much pleasanter) music.

People who haven't figured out that iPod earbuds AREN'T THE SAME AS HEADPHONES and don't prevent me from hearing their music, made even more obnoxious by the fact that it's all tinny.

People who don't realize that, as much as they may enjoy loudly crunching, slurping, and sucking their food, those around them may not enjoy the results.

People in crowded places (like airplanes and waiting rooms) who don't know how to use their indoor voices.

Really, it's all a sign that some folks simply don't think about common courtesy, which often boils down to thinking about other people for at least a nanosecond once in a while . . .

People who drive too slow...AND people who drive too fast. And the fact that the cops aren't around to ticket either. We have several major streets that run through residential areas and therefore turn from four-lane to two lane for a period of time. (This somehow made sense to the city engineers when we all rode horses).The sign telling drivers this is BIG. HUGE. YELLOW AND BLACK. However, no one in the right lane seems to realize there's a need to merge until the last possible second. Springfield Avenue becomes lap 500 at Indy!
The slow drivers hit their brakes, the speeders rev their engines. If it didn't happen unfailingly during rush minute, it would be comical.
Shoppers who decide they can't afford the box of frozen peas or fish or the T-Bone Steak and leave it nicely placed in the cereal aisle. What is this thing about not putting items back where you find them? Are you too busy talking on the cell? Did your cart get a flat tire?
And, since I work in a bookstore, this makes me livid; shoppers who buy coffee 'to go' and then decide to set it on top of books while they browse the tables. We had one man knock over a fresh cup on a stack of trades because he was putting on his gloves.
He apologized. Period. We were so busy mopping up the mess, we didn't notice he'd left the store. We had to return a bunch of books because they were soaked. Of course, the store gets credit but back in the day, if you broke it you bought it. Evidently that's not the case anymore. And oh yeah...reading mags in the store doesn't mean you can stuff them in the side of the chairs when you're done.
Long story short. Nothing peeves me more than someone who will not take the time to be considerate, whether it's in a bookstore, library, theater (turn off the damn cell please) or on the street. The over-use of cell phones runs a close second, a server bringing me lukewarm food is third.

People who insist on making appointments with me after 5 on Friday because it's the only time they can possibly get there and it's really really really important they see me, and who then don't show up and don't call to cancel.

People who tell me "This is not a sales call" when it bloody well is.

People who don't seem to know when a phone conversation is over, but who instead keep repeating the same thing they've already told me twice.

Self-serve checkouts. I'll pay an extra nickel an item if you'll employ someone to check me out. I almost never use self-service checkouts.

Self-serve drink fountains at fast-food places. You didn't reduce the price when you decided that you would not pay me to do what you were paying someone else to do. Why not?

How about everyones new favorite word of the moment: "apparently". It seems to be a preface to peoples retelling of gossip, personal accounts, or retelling of news stories. At first I thought it was just a new verbal affectation from my daughter, but I have noticed it on TV and from others heard in conversation.

My other pet peeve: The use of street slang by adults who should know better. Drives me crazy. The terms that really drive me crazy are 'My bad' and 'bling'.

Great blog....we could go on and on...

Here are mine:

Gossip that begins with this phrase, "I'm sorry, but..." because the person is not sorry.

The word "utilize" when use will do just fine.

Pedestrians who take their time, even stopping to hold full conversations, in the middle of the street while my light is green. (That may be a Montpelier, Vt. thing - pedestrians rule here.) Also, people who stop to have conversations in their cars thereby holding up the whole parking lot.

Women who preface their opinions with, "I just feel..." Get some backbone! It's okay to state your opinion without blaming your emotions.

Presidents who start wars, run the economy into the ground by looking the other way while big business, big banks and big oil rape the little guy, inflame the public's fears instead of urging us to be courageous and who borrow from tomorrow to pay for today and then who act cocky and snide when someone dares to question that.

Not that I have any particular President in mind.

Got me on another snowy, gray day Rebecca....

Oh, my, where to begin?

The word "got", as in "I have got a cold". When "I have a cold" will suffice. The word "that" is another one that is used altogether too freely, and I agree it is used incorrectly instead of "who".

People who talk on cell phones more loudly than the conversational sound level in general, so everyone in the vicinity can hear every golden word they say about Don's hernia or Lula's husband's rotten stepkids. Give me a break. And using a cell phone, for any reason other than to call 911, in a public or private restroom is so very wrong. Then there are those who use their phones while driving, without a headset, so they have to use one hand to hold the phone. But the worst is when a car is going s-l-o-w-l-y in the fast lane, and when you pass you can see, yes, they ARE on the phone. On a recent, 1900-mile car trip, this happened countless times.

The general lack of courtesy bothers me greatly, from the media to retail clerks. It's refreshing to go south and to hear "Yes, ma'am", even if it isn't sincere and is just a knee jerk response because of long training and use. I so agree with you, Rebecca, about the lack of eye contact. I checked out at KMart once (I rarely go there to shop), and the clerk, who was on the phone, scanned every single item, rang up the sale, and accepted my credit card and signature, all without once making eye contact. I was awed by her utter disinterest.

Yellow Rose of Texas was a TV show in the 80's (I think); it was just getting good when it was canceled. Santa Barbara, too, which was the best soap opera ever.

Most people should be parking as far from their destination as possible, not closer. 'Nuff said.

"My other pet peeve: The use of street slang by adults who should know better. Drives me crazy. The terms that really drive me crazy are 'My bad' and 'bling'."

Word. That's wack, yo.

See? I did it, too. The word "that" is another used altogether too freely.

JD, I'm with you on the appointment issue.

People on cell phones in check out lines. I don't know what's worse - directly behind so I get an earful or directly ahead as they hold up the line because they are distracted by the phone call.

Lot's of driving pet peeves but my number one is when a driver waves "Thank you" because you slammed on your brakes when they turned left in front of you. What else could I do, hit you? &*!@! Oh, I see, they are thanking me because I have good brakes and reaction time.

Ditto, Ditto on the President Who Must Not Be Named, Sarah!!

My pet peeves are some of the above, but also people who park their carts in the middle of store aisles so you can't steer yours on either side...which also backs up "cart" traffic.

Here's one that's pretty stupid, but it makes me irritated just the same. I can't stand clothes hangers that get bunched up and caught in each other. It doesn't matter if it's wire or plastic, none of them are immune from tangling.

I don't mind people talking on their cell phones (when not driving cars), but I do mind when they talk loud on their cell phones.

I also don't like it when someone who is supposed to be helping me (clerk, cashier, waiter) is snotty or rude when I ask for something nicely or try to ask them a question. It's as if they can't be bothered.

Oh, and I cringe every time I hear someone end a sentence with "at" as in "Where's it at?" when "Where is it?" should suffice!

I really really hate people who speed through school zones. More often than not the speeder is a driver who is of the age to actually have children attending school. Geez! And I'm with Kerry on the use if I instead of me. You hear that from all sorts of people, people who should know better. It's like fingernails on a blackboard to me. Oops! That is another pet peeve.

Another parking lot peeve: people who walk down the middle of the travel lane going to or coming from their cars and won't get out of the way.

On the cell phone issue: Yes, it can be annoying. But I've pulled some great nuggets out of loud nearby CP conversations, some of which I've already used in dialogue and some I will some day when the time and character are right. One of the great things about being a writer is you can eavesdrop without feeling guilty.

Hey! Harley's character Mary was killed on Santa Barbara by the giant "C" from Hotel Capwell falling on her. There were several versions of retrospective of Mary and Mason's relationship out on Youtube when I looked it up a year or so ago.

Another thing I dislike is when people listen in on the conversations I have on my cell phone. Oh...that's you, JD? Oops! My bad! :-)

Yes, yes on "irregardless" . . . Also, "at the end of the day" is used so much, I finally just put in my last novel as the title of a soap opera. I don't know why it bugs me, it just does. What does it even mean? "In the long run" I guess, or "when all's said and done" but you never hear anyone say, "at the beginning of the day, it's okay to lie, cheat and steal, but at the end of the day, you'll sleep better if you're nice to people." I guess the first part of the sentence is implied.

In L.A., 95% of the population drive SUVs or minivans, yet 95% of all parking spots seem to be designated "compact" and I guess everyone voted on Suburbans and Hummers being compact cars while I was off doing something else. Grocery shopping, I guess. Hunting for milk. And Oreos. Because the biggest cars imaginable are always in the "compact" spaces.

Oh, so true, JD! I was in NYC recently. Two women were sitting at the table next to me while I was eating lunch. One of them was telling her entire life story to her companion, very "woe is me". I was furiously writing down everything she said, it was so sordid.

Annie Proulx used snippets of phone conversation in one of her short stories in "Close Range". I wondered if she overheard some of them, they were all so different.

Moral of the story: Be careful what you say in public. You just don't know who is sitting next to you!

Mary and Mason--the best love story ever. Sigh.

I've picked up the best tidbits from conversations on buses and the Metro (DC subway). The lives some of those people lead!

Hey, Becky, you don't want me writing down your cell phone conversations, keep 'em out of my airspace. :-)

Wildest one I ever heard was in an airport, where the guy walking behind me down the concourse was obviously talking to a married woman with whom he was having an affair.

Ooh, boy, on this dreary Friday when I'd rather be almost anywhere but sitting at my desk, I could perhaps go on all day with this.

I'm with Bea with the drivers. I like the ones who are so much more important than everyone else, so they have to drive on your ass and flash their lights when you're passing someone else, even though you're already going faster than the actual posted limit. Or drive ahead of the line of traffic waiting to get off the ramp or make the turn, and then cut in front of everyone. And I'm sorry, but the cell phone talkers driving the huge SUVs and paying no attention to anything around them (especially the small cars like me), are going to kill us all.

Parents who let their kids run wild in stores and restaurants. And those wheelies need to be banned from existence.

Items enclosed in plastic packaging that is impossible to get open without hacking the thing to pieces.

I'll stop for now.

Wow, what a subject. I'm with you, Sarah, on the subject of the "he who must not be named" President, and there is a clock that counts down the minutes to the end of this particular nightmare, but I can't find the link right now.
My mom always said that any TV show she liked would always be cancelled. I'm glad to have _Men in Trees_ back, and _Medium_.
Rude drivers and pedestrians blocking the street -- I don't see this often, but I remember well the woman who stopped the trash truck for a conversation, blocking the only road in or out of our subdivision, who then yelled at me for honking, "I needed to tell him something." Answering her would have wasted even more of my time, but I hope the "you've done wrong" stare I learned from my mother conveyed the message.
cell phones -- I seldom use mine (reassuring when I see articles on dangers of tumors and such), and I hate when someone's cell interrupts a meal with friends. I love the postal clerk who sent someone to the end of the line to finish her conversation on the cell, and I do think using them in the car should be a ticketable offense. Storytelling events usually begin with an announcement to silence electronic devices, and some of our tellers have very creative ways to deal with offenders. My favorite, must make a donation to the library (or buy the MC a bottle of wine) to get the phone back ;-)
that -- my Warriner's Grammar says that is allowed for people, but which is not. Orientate is not a word!
One positive, because it surprised me when I first noticed it -- Walgreens, big business, has a corporate philosophy of providing friendly neighborhood service. I asked them not to have balloons, no problem. Special orders, no problem. If I can't find something on the shelf, a staff member walks with me and finds it for me, if necessary.
Oh, and on the balloon subject, the library has banned balloons, except for one event they already booked, and during that week I can use the curbside service they already have in place. They even rescheduled the Readers and Stitchers group to be before the invasion of the latex. Yeah!! I can live without Applebee's, but not without the library.

"Irregardless" drives me bananas, particularly when it's used by a grad school professor who claims to be a "real stickler" for grammar. Geh.

Another branch on the cell phone tree - people who pick up their kids after 8 or 10 hours of day care and are always on the cell phone the entire time... "Hey sweetie... I know, I couldn't believe he was trying to pull that on her...Get your coat on...When she went back with him I knew it'd be a problem... Say bye! ...well, she should've known what she was getting into..." and on and on. Not only is it disrespectful to the caregiver who wanted to tell you what a great day your kid had (or what a heathen she was...could go either way!), what message does that send to the kid?!

The word "signage" drives me berserk. "Sign" is already a noun! It doesn't need to be noun-ified! If you're trying to sound high-falutin', use "advertising."

OH! Using It's instead of Its. Happens constantly, everywhere. Drives me absolutely nuts.

And people who walk into a doorway, and then stand there, chatting, while you're trying to get around them.

' At this point in time' grrrrr
Latest teenage buzzword, 'actually'. I know one kid, who the more he says it, you know he's lying.
Email chain letters! Especially the ones about what good friends we are blahblah, send to 12 people in 5 minutes or you'll have bad luck forever. (if we were that gooda friends, you wouldn't keep sending this shit and you already know what bad luck I have!)

If your store doesn't carry a particular item, just tell me. It's okay. I'll return to the store for another item on another day. You didn't lose a customer.

But you might if I have another moment like this: ran into store to pick up small electronic device (for inquiring minds -- a mini tape recorder). Asked a clerk, where's your electronics? bec I can't find the sign. A wave towards center of store. Okay. Fourteen aisles later still can't find it. Asked another clerk (it's a miracle there were two actually on the sales floor), another wave. Third clerk (break time must've been over bec of plethora of help) I saw I asked for specific item. Got a 'if we had it, it'd be over there' and a general wave. Fourth, same question, same answer. Fifth clerk, same question and an answer beginning 'if we had --' and I screeched 'don't say it! don't say it! --'. Poor guy took pity, walked over to the display, handed me the item, the blank tapes, package of batteries and even escorted me to the check-out which was very nice, except the teen-ager was peeved having to end her phone conversation ...

(I've been living down here for a long while but haven't lost the NJ accent. So I get a lot of 'you poor thing' when I'm lost in a store and/or need help, etc. The last sales guy clucked and used this phrase, so I can't be too peeved. For right now, anyway.)

JD, you reminded me of a supposedly true story Dan Keding brought back from England. A man on a commuter train was talking lovingly on his mobile about the romantic evening he would be enjoying with . . .whoever was on the other end of the conversation. He then called his wife and said how sorry he was that "business" would keep him from coming home for his son's birthday. He then went to the loo, leaving his phone on the table between seats (those commuter trains must be very civilized). A woman picked up his phone, hit redial, and told the wife what everyone on the train had overheard.
The phone was ringing when the man returned, "What? You heard what? No don't call the lawyer, don't leave the house. I'll be right home." He got off at the next stop, to a round of applause. Several business people gave the woman their cards, liking the way she dealt with problems and offering jobs.

Things that irk me:

People that park their vehicle so close to mine that I can't open my car do to get inside.

People that chew their food with their mouth open.

The 50 gazillion twists and ties and plastic enclosures in toy packaging.

Folks in the customer service business (politicians included) that forget their customers.

Using the word done when what you really mean is completed or finished as in I'm done eating. Drives me crazy!!!! Even my cell phone and tivo do it now. Just because people are too stupid to learn proper grammer does not make it so. The illegals know the english language better than those born here these days!

Hah! Mary, that's a cautionary tale if ever I've heard one.

Jeanne reminded me of another retail irritant: "you'll have to wait." Not as in "there's a line," but as in "we're making some new fries/chcken/wahtever, you'll have to wait till it's done."

Or walking into a store asking for an item, and being told "we just got that in, you'll have to come back tomorrow when it's unpacked."

Ah,no. I don't "have to" ever come back.

On the cell phone front (again): I will cut certain people some slack. Around here we have a lot of military families with loved ones serving overseas. They have to take the call when it comes in because god knows when their SO will be able to get the phone again.

Yes, Laura, the poor apostrophe. It's as if no one knows quite what to do with it. (Taco's served today, avocado's on sale -- I've told clerks I won't buy the product until they fix the sign. I will also pull out a Sharpie and fix signs, sometimes with my sister on guard duty. (I told my Shakespeare students that I won't order a Caesar salad in a restaurant that can't spell it right on the menu).
The book, _Eats, Shoots, and Leaves_ is a humorous rant about various grammar problems.

Mary, I have to say that is the best story I have heard in ages. It almost 'beats' the story of how Willie Nelson's wife got her divorce. That is something I would like to think I would do. But no one ever leaves their cell phone just sitting there.

"Like". My daughter uses that work "like it is going out of style, like". Drives me & Dear Hubby insane.

Mary reminded me of another punctuation blooper that I find baffling: the apparently random way some people use quotation marks.

As in BANANAS "ON SALE" TODAY. Or WEDNESDAY "SPECIAL". I mean, are they being ironic or what?

People who smell bad drive me batty.

I don't mean homeless people, or people who are sick. I mean people who have indoor plumbing and the resources to purchase shampoo, soap, whatever, and just choose not to use them.

And the same goes for people who wear too much fragrance. Men and women are both guilty of this. If I can smell your perfume or your cologne or whatever about a block before I can see you, that's a problem.

In a related peeve, those predators in stores who want to spray you with stuff that they think smells good. Back off!

How did Willie Nelson's wife got her divorce?

Oops! get not got

Don't even get me started on fat women who wear tight, low cut tops and shorts in their crack! ugh! Makes me feel skinny!
Don't they have mirrors?!
Or the boys with jeans falling off their butts and the crotch at their knees. Take lots of pictures, parents, you can use them for blackmail when the kid finally grows up! LOL

Great blog and comments! I love that one from Mary Storyteller...

My current peeve: I notice that people are overusing the word "as", for example,
"I'm really busy today as I have to go to the doctor, the store, and the library."

People are trying to sound smart, and it just ends up sounding ridiculous. (It's mostly in e-mails and blogs where I see it)
I know that I'm not the queen of proper language use all the time, but I try!

Kathy - most dept stores now have the demonstrators spray a piece of paper with the fragrances' name on it. They got too many lawsuits from people with allergies.


It seems that Willie wasn't such a nice guy when he married the first time. He drank a lot and when he came home to the little lady after a show, he would beat her. Pretty good, too from what both of them have said. She finally got tired of it (he always promised to quit, and did for quite a while, but that bottle would just keep singin' to him). After he finished kicking her around one night, he passed out on their bed. She stripped him down, wrapped him up in a white sheet, and beat him with a baseball bat. She then loaded him into the car and dumped him on the side of a remote country road. When he came home 3 days later, he had one broken arm, a couple of ribs, and lots and lots of bruises. He offered her a good settlement and she walked out. He says he has never beaten another of his wives. And he switched to the 'wacky tabacky' instead of booze...said it made him mellower and not as angry. LOL!!!

I should have put in, she stripped him down buck nekid.

I think he said once he got out of the sheet he had to walk a couple of miles before he found a house to use the phone.

I waited 22 minutes in the rain this morning for a bus that is supposed to arrive every 8 minutes. The buses in Vancouver easily my biggest pet peeve.

Then there are stinky people on the bus. When did brushing your teeth go out of style? And washing your clothes?

And the people with cell phones, the first words in their conversations "I am on the bus". Yes, we all know that.

When the frustration gets too high, I walk the 3 mile commute, struggling with people blocking the sidewalk, whacking me with their umbrellas (this is Vancouver) or my favourite, people who don't look where they are going and walk right into me.

All of this to get to a job where I have to answer the phone all day to people who don't know how to be succinct. A major pet peeve for me since I am not allowed to scream "Get to the point" at them.

I listened to my body, for once, and I'm not going to Cape. I actually got to the car, noticed that I was building a headache and my hip was hurting and that I’d dawdled so long that by the time I did the 2 hour drive the afternoon events would be nearly over, and by the time I got back home from the evening events, it would be really late — and since I had no role to play, I wouldn’t be that much missed — I got back out of the car and came upstairs. There are going to be really good people there, whom I would love to see again, but there is just so much going on right now. . . .and there will be other events. (and if I go for an allergy shot, perhaps I’ll feel better tomorrow when I give my workshop to the preschool teachers). Discretion/valor, and all that.
Perfume -- that's a good one. I've had to change seats in the theater because of others' perfume (I also have to move if the actors smoke on stage). Yesterday I loaned my emergency shawl (pareo?) to a friend at the library, and when she gave it back, it was so perfumed that I decided "ok, it was about time to wash it anyway"). Smelly people -- sometimes it's hygiene (my friend tells of a guy with green teeth who tried to pick her up), sometimes it's medical. I learned on "Bones" (and confirmed from other sources later) that very obese people have a problem with mold growing in the folds of their skin -- sad, but a reason for this "poster child for allergies" to stay away.
BTW, from my ex --
Subject: SJN: What Rev. Jeremiah Wright Really Said
(and I could actually listen because my "good" downstairs neighbor just got wireless).

Gaylin, I know what you mean. Dear Hubby drives me nuts because he goes 360 around a story or problem and all I want to do is yell, "GET TO THE FREAKIN' POINT!!!!!" :-)

It may be a peeve for some people, but I think it's really funny when a restaurant sign or menu says: "roast beef au jus in its own juice." That just cracks me up!

One of my pet peeves is too many handicap parking spaces in front of all the stores. One store here has at least 10 handicap spots - leaving nothing at all close - and yet there are NEVER more than 2 cars in those spots at one time.

And on that note, there are never any close spots to anything anymore. The big box stores are football fields long, with only 2 doors. Can't we add more doors around back? Can't there be parking close to any doors? Do firetrucks really need to be able to circle the building? Of course the answer is yes, but it has made 'a quick trip to the store' obsolete. And of course, milk at the furthest point from the door is another huge pet peeve.

But I do like the self-checkout, Josh, because I can do it faster than most clerks!

I apologize to those of you with pet peeves, who I have offended with my lack of grammar skills!

Janetlynn, on the other side of the handicap parking issue, I get irritated when there isn't enough handicap parking. When I was on crutches and had a temporary handicap pass, I had a hard time finding empty handicap spaces. And I see several older or disabled people who have to walk too far because they can't find empty spaces. Our major grocery stores are adjacent to housing complexes for the elderly, so we're in great need of more, not less. Too bad we can't take some of yours.

WOW - how great to see so many of us letting off some steam. Welcome to the new commenters - be sure to come back and share with us again.

It's no secret that TLC is a great blog because of the comments - hell, most of the time, they're better than the original blog, at least with mine.

Mary - you nailed one of my Pet Peeves, and the longer this election goes on, the worse it gets. Taking things out of context. I saw the Rev Wright's full comments too, and cannot believe what a mischaracterization that single piece is - but I know he said some other things that are offensive, even in context.

The problem is that we can't trust these jackasses who claim to be reporting the 'news' any more. You never get the whole story. Everyone has an agenda, and it has nothing to do with informing the public.

Here is a Pet Peeve I got via e-mail from someone too shy to post:

'People who make loud noises - like burping, or gulping, especially in restaurants, when the rest of us are trying to eat, not get nauseous. Close your mouth! Were you born in a barn?'

Couldn't agree more. In fact, the less I know about any one else's bodily functions, the better.

Apostrophes run wild. "House's for sale." I want to say, "the house's what?"

I changed my mind. I do have a pet peeve: media bashing.

I see a "pulmonologist" for my asthma and there are signs all over his office "Please do not wear perfume when in this office. It can bother some of our patients with severe asthma". Trouble is...his nurses wear perfume.

The blog of unnecessary quotation marks:

Do the drug commercials on TV tick anyone else off? Come on, they are controlled substances! The side effects are always given in a 'lull you to sleep voice'. (Celebrex tells you 3 times how these side effects could result in death!)
Any day, I expect a study to show that the leading cause of death in America is side effects!

Thanks, Pam. Guess what was good for the goose was good for the gander.

People who write in the margins of library books!

I believe on the handicap spot issue, that stores are required to have a certain number of them depending on the square footage of the store. That's why the huge stores seem to have so many.

OK, this is petty, but I really hate when a cashier gives you change, and he/she puts the bills in your hand and the coins on top of it. Then everything is slithering around while you're trying to get it all into your wallet. When I was a cashier, we were trained to place the coins in the customer's hand first, then the bills.

Amen, gaylin. In fact, ANYONE who writes "how true!" in the margin of a book should be slapped with a dead trout.

Laura, part of that problem is no one makes change anymore. The register tells them how much to give back and the change is pulled from the register rather than counted back to the customer. I'm not sure anyone even knows how to count back change now, especially younger people.

Pet peeves - having to move to different seats in a movie theatre due to perfume- soaked people or, when the theatre has lots of empty seats, people, for some weird reason, have to sit either directly behind or directly in front of us.

I just added another one: people who mumble their name and number on your answering machine so it's impossible to tell who called.

-- most of the time, they're better than the original blog, at least with mine.
Rebecca, you are too modest -- yours is a great blog, interesting and well-written!
Ditto on the change UNDER the bills request. It just makes sense.

-- and another good thing, "my" IGA, which does have many shoppers from a senior center, puts out bakery selections in single servings, so one can indulge in a small treat but not be stuck with a whole pie.
I'm off now to buy a mailbox (something I've never done)! and maybe go for coffee at the Crooked Tree.

Oooh! The Rx commercials really tick me off - especially when I'm about to pay at the pharmacy!

Stupid rules for no apparent reason other than the remote possibility of a lawsuit.
Tailgaters - especially when there's ice and snow on the roads.
Forwarded emails, unless they are REALLY funny and REALLY new. Especially fake news stories - who sits around making up that sh#$%t?
Scratches on the last CD of a book on tape from the library.
Waiting more than 20 minutes in a doctor's office.
Doctors with appts only during regular business hours.
Parents who keep play dates even when their kids are sick.

Elaine, on apostrophes gone wild - Hoss's Restuarant signs drive me crazy. I know it's acceptable under today's usage rules but I tell you Mrs. Legge who taught me grammar in third grade is rolling over in her grave!

Here's something that's less of a peeve than it is a bit of advice for people who "screen" calls, that is, let the answering machine answer and then call whoever it is back.

If you're calling a professional person with a number of clients, such as a lawyer, accountant or doctor, and you need to leave a message, please understand this: when the time comes to return messages, that person is going to sit down with stack of messages in hand and call one after the other. If he or she gets an answering machine, he or she will leave a message and immediately move on to the next message. So, when you call back a minute later, your professional actually WILL be on another call. Please do not get all pissy and say 'but he JUST CALLED!" In particular, do not accuse the receptionist of lying about it, especially when said receptionist is my wife. Thank you.

JDRhoades - as a receptionist another pet peeve call "Someone from there just called me"
and I am supposed to know who?

or "how long will they be in the meeting"

using a very civil tone I respond "until it is over"

JD - you are on a roll today! Your poor wife - I'll bet she has some peeves that would knock us out.

Yo, JD! Chill, dude! You got some major dissing going on, bro.

Seriously, is it wack or whack? I never know.

gaylin: it's especially ridiculous when the caller doesn't even identify himself.

"Hey, someone called me."

Well, bless your heart, isn't that just wonderful. And you thought you were going to be lonely forever.

I'm sorry to hear that Willie Nelson was such a cad; I've always liked him enormously. Bravo to his ex.

Mary, congratulations on the balloon ban at the library! The squeaky wheel does get the grease. Krogers, which is the main grocery chain here, also has individual servings of their freshly baked pies. It's so much better for the two of us to get two slices, rather than a whole pie that we feel compelled to polish off. Burp.

Gaylin, you reminded me of another pet peeve: "busses", supposed to mean the plural of bus, when it actually means more than one kiss.

Pet Peeve of the day...people who send an e-mail asking you to call them! In the time it took them to type the e-mail they could have picked up the phone and dialed.

Pet peeves:
1) The lap-dog segment of the American press (if you're going to write PR for your masters, call it what it is, and yourself what you are)
2) Constant repetition of the myth of the liberal media and other NeoCon agitprop distributed by wholly-owned-and-operated media subsidiaries
3) An obsession with low taxes when the national infrastructure - and our children's future - is disintegrating
4) Left-Lane Bandits (slow or inattentive drivers blocking the passing lane on highways)
5) Bookstores 'too cool' to stock Dusty's novels

Clients who don't return calls or respond to emails, then make contact at 430pm the day before one is in court at 9am next morning with "emergencies".

To use Josh's wonderful phrase, "Bullshit business terms"; as in "We need a paradigm shift in our decision making process so everyone can get on the bandwagon and we can win one for the team." That crap went out of date in 1995. You sound like an idiot.

Tom is my new hero.

William: Your clients actually call you the day before? Mine wait until 8:45 the morning of court.

Tom! News flash! The American press is not a charitable organization! Just like publishing, they have to be profitable to stay in business! And if you mean propaganda, say propaganda!

Everybody else, I apologize. I think Tom's obsession with insulting the media is my new pet peeve.

Remembered a pet peeve that is still the scourge of English teachers everywhere. Beginning sentences with "Ya Know". My father cured us of this back in the 70's by constantly repeating this little ditty when ever we would forget and speak that phrase.
He would immediately cut us off and say,
"You know?
The further a squirrel runs up the tree,
The smaller his !*#hole appears to be."

Now I have to bite my tongue sometimes to keep from speaking aloud when some chronic users of the phrase are around me.

This little rhyme, along with many other fatherisms has become a family classic, oft repeated amongst friends and family.

Now children...play nice... ;-)

JD, how about the people who screen calls, then pick up the phone to talk, and the message keeps going? Then you both have to wait until the message is over to say anything. Yeesh!

Peach, I'll have to remember that rhyme for myself, since I sometimes kid around and say "Ya know" several times to my husband until I get his attention. Poor thing, it's a wonder he puts up with me.

JD, had a couple of those, too.

If I add judges with severe cases of HUA Syndrome, does that count as a pet peeve?

(For the uninitiated, HUA is Head Up Ass Syndrome).

Facts, professional integrity and profitability are mutually exclusive? Naaah, can't be, I'd have gotten a memo.

Yes, it takes a lot of integrity to repeatedly and publicly insult an entire profession. Lap dogs and jackasses, indeed. But you have the right to keep banging that drum, Tom, just like I have the right to go play with my voodoo dolls now.

Last peeve of the day (for me) - the crosswalk signal is not a right turn signal - stop trying to hit me with your car! And get off the cell phone.

Stupid little college girls who ask other women who are AT MOST six years older than them if they are the parents of another college student. Sorry, know I brought it up the other day, but I'm still bitter, and COME ON!!!!!!!! My former No. 1 but now No. 2 pet peeve? People who say Missour-uh instead of Missouri-ee. Our own boy-genius of a governor pronounces it this way (and in my opinion, the ability to properly announce the name of the state you lead should be a requirement for office) as well as my grandmother and it is like nails on a chalkboard to me. I don't know why it always irks me so much, but NAME ONE OTHER INSTANCE in which I is proununched uh. Just one. Oh, that's right. YOU CAN'T!!!! Passive agressive people. Irritates the shit out of me. People who will bitch about you and whatever you've done to piss them off behind your back, but are all sugar and light to your face. When anyone starts off a sentence with "No offense but," or "I don't mean to be a(n) bitch, a-hole etc. but". If you don't want to offend or be an a-hole, then don't. Using one of those phrases does not give you free license to be rude or bitchy. Tailgaters. I don't mean the fabulous, let's get drunk in the stadium parking lot kind (the ranks of whom I occasionally join ...) I mean the annoying jackhole who JUST CAN'T WAIT to get the the next exit five seconds faster than you, so they ride your ass even though you yourself are already going 5-10 miles over the speed limit (which means they're going way too fast) and then when you finally pull over, just to get rid of them, they slow down and take their own sweet time passing so you have to hit the brakes to shut off cruise control before you become the tailgate-riding jackhole for the snail in front of you. People that act holier-than-thou about anything. You just know they're the worst offenders on whichever topic they happen to be so snotty about. And ditto to Ramona re: media bashing.

Properly pronounce. Pronounce. Geeze. And I make my living with words ...

Ramona, remember the warning you sent me about the voodoo dolls and the return of four (?) times the negative energy to the sender. . .be careful. (of course, you could wish for him to have 1/4 of the winning lottery numbers ;-)
Karen, the Missouri (ee or uh) disagreement is a regional thing. We explained the controversy to a teller from North Carolina, who asked the audience the next day which pronunciation they used, miz-er-ee or -uh for "the state we are in." Since she was telling at Our Lady of the Snows, in Illinois, there were some funny looks until she was reminded where she actually was. (Well, she flew into St. Louis). Then someone explained the Illinois debate about whether to pronounce that final "s."

Katherine, the stupid little college girl will learn -- you probably just looked extra sophisticated that day. Age is so tricky.
The builders' receptionist asked if my realtor was my son, and he got a very strange look on his face. When we were outside, he told me his age, only seven years younger than me -- little brother.
A storytelling friend offered to be my mama when my mother died, but I said I didn't think so. We discussed our ages, and she's my big sister.

I've been specific about *exactly which part* of the media so annoys me, Ramona - and I'm quite sure that none of your family or friends is one of Those People. Said that before and I'll say it again.

Meanwhile, if you could put a needle in at about T3 or T4 and give it a wiggle, I'd appreciate it.

Stay-at-home-moms in the grocery store (especially in the late afternoon) the day before a holiday. I'm sorry. If you don't work, you have no business being in Giant Eagle on the day before Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, whatever, because that's not the only time you can shop. AND GET OUT OF THE MIDDLE OF THE AISLES. You can exchange vacation photographs and talk about Heather and Bobby some other time. If I ruled the world, you'd have to show a pay stub to gain admittance to the grocery store on the day before a holiday.

Also, drivers who pull up to within two inches of my bumper when I am stopped going up a hill in the winter. Because you know, of course, that I'm going to go roll back a bit before I go forward, no matter what I do or don't do.

There are many others, but these are the biggest...

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