TEDDY BEARS AND BLACK SWANS

By John J. Lamb

It’s an unexpected honor to be invited to contribute to The Lipstick Chronicles, but then again, pretty much everything about my career as a mystery author has been surprising. I’m currently reading Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s The Black Swan, a fascinating book about the impact of highly improbable events, and couldn’t help but notice that my path to success as a writer confirmed one of the book’s key premises: The human race — both individually and as a group — is consistently lousy at predicting the future. And I’m a less prescient prophet than most.

To illustrate, before chasing down my dream to become a professional author, I spent eighteen years as a cop in one of the more violent cities in Southern California. I had a blast working the streets in a black-and-white and later served as a CSI, homicide investigator, hostage negotiator, and detective sergeant. Over the years, I worked on about a hundred murders and went to over a thousand other assorted death scenes. Moreover, I had a well-deserved reputation among the other cops for my macabre sense of humor.

As you might expect, I someday saw myself writing gritty police thrillers packed with gunplay, gore, and graphic violence. My first two novels (deservedly unsold and, if there’s a merciful God, forever forgotten) reflected that orthodox mindset. Who could have foreseen that when writing success came, it would arrive in the form of a series of unabashedly cozy murder mysteries about teddy bear artists and stuffed animals? I still have trouble believing it and I won’t pretend I truly understand how it all unfolded.

So, how did a cynical street cop, who could devour barbecued ribs for lunch at Tony Roma’s between morning and afternoon autopsies, come to write teddy bear mysteries? It begins as a love story and if you saw this tale on some sappy made-for-television movie on the Hallmark Channel, you’d dismiss it as the worst sort of schmaltz. Yet, it’s true. I met my future wife, Joyce, at the police department, where she worked as a latent fingerprint expert and crime analyst. She was beautiful, smart, and one of the finest investigators I’ve ever known.

Shortly after we began to go out together, I bought her a girl teddy bear named "Skyler." To this day, I can still remember standing in that gift shop, carefully examining the faces of the teddy bears to make sure I’d picked out precisely the best one, while praying that no one from the police department spotted me. You see, I still had that reputation to uphold for being colder than liquid oxygen … not that Joyce ever bought into the charade.

Joyce and I were married in 1998. This was a time of enormous change. I’d been medically retired from the police department and was learning to enjoy a life that didn’t involve corpses, crazy folks threatening to kill themselves, and routine carnage. I suppose the teddy bears were an unintentional component in a psychic detox program. They were sweet and innocent … two traits I’d seldom encountered as a cop. We continued to collect bears and then we went to our very first teddy bear show. After that, we were hooked and our collection now numbers over 600 stuffed animals.

Fast forward to 2004. Joyce was now retired from the police department and we’d moved from Southern California to the pastoral Shenandoah Valley. We live in farmland about two miles from the Blue Ridge Mountains and less than a hundred yards from the South Fork of the Shenandoah River. It’s a heavenly setting and our home is full of teddy bears, four golden retrievers, and six "rescued" cats.

My literary agent had just sold my first novel (a police procedural titled Echoes of the Lost Order) to Five Star and she asked if I thought I could write a cozy mystery, because Berkley Prime Crime was acquiring new titles. I tried to sound confident when I replied that I could, but I had my doubts. What did I know about cozy mysteries? Yet, as I sat smoking my pipe on our front porch, I had an epiphany: With Joyce and my backgrounds in cop work and a home full of teddy bears, I was living the setting for a cozy mystery. It seemed too good to be true. I wrote up a proposal and a couple of sample chapters and Berkley quickly signed me to three books. I still have trouble believing it happened.

And the improbabilities continued to pile up. Although I was a new and unknown author, The Mournful Teddy sold extremely well. Later, the book was named as a finalist for the Dilys Award, which was even more mind-boggling. Back when I was a cop, if someone had suggested that I’d be a finalist for a literary award, I’d have asked how much rock cocaine he’d been smoking. More success followed with The False-Hearted Teddy and Berkley signed me up to write books number four and five in the series. I’ve achieved a lifelong dream, but not quite the way I expected.

Looking back, I think I’ve learned a couple of things. First, I must never discount the fact that I’ve benefitted enormously from luck, fate, or maybe Taleb’s "Black Swan" or "highly improbable event." However, that propitious event would never have happened if I hadn’t stayed in the game for six years, refining my talent and never losing sight of the goal of becoming a professional author. Finally, I have to acknowledge one other very fortunate occurrence in my life and that was meeting Joyce. Without her, there would be no teddy bears in my life, no cozy mysteries, and no joy. So, maybe the ultimate "highly improbable event" is merely finding someone who brings out the very best in you.

Comments

[Rebecca the Bookseller]

What a great blog - thanks for sharing your story with us at TLC!

The image of Mr. Tough Cop taking such care to choose the right teddy bear is wonderful!

[Nancy Martin]

I love your epiphany of living the cozy mystery! Adorable. And the books are, too, John. Thanks for being our guest!

[Annette]

Thanks for sharing your story with us John. Life is full of surprises isn't it. I too am workiing at a job that not in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine I would be doing and LOVE it. I hope it is as rewarding for you as it is for me. And my husband is supportive, just like Joyce. Maybe we should form a We Are Happy With Our Jobs support group. I love teddy bears and dolls. Is your wife a writer also or is she the driving force behind that awesome teddy bear collection?
I look forward to reading your series.

[Harley]

John, that is wild. It's like Betty Crocker writing hardcore thrillers! I look forward to reading you.

[John Lamb]

Thanks to everyone for the kind comments. To answer Kathy's questions, Joyce isn't a writer. However, she is a mystery fan and her analytical background makes her a proofreader extraordinaire. What's more, she loves me enough to tell me when what I've written isn't up to snuff. As far as the driving force behind our bear collection is concerned, I must confess that I'm no longer merely an enabler. Last month, we were at a bear show in Leesburg VA, where I picked out a sweet teddy bear in a sailor suit. And it's my fervent hope that none of my old homicide detective partners are going to read this, because they already have serious doubts about me.

[William Simon]

John, I don't see anything at all contradictory about the tough cop deliberating about the proper teddy bear. In fact, it makes perfect sense to me; things like that keep us sane.

While I apologize for not being familiar with your work, I hope I can make up for that by telling you I've already ordered your books.

Welcome to The Lipstick Chronicles!

[Elaine Viets]

Welcome, John, and thanks for telling us another terrific story.

[John Lamb]

Another thing worth mentioning is that we really like being around teddy bear artists and collectors. They're kind people, who laugh a lot. And, at the risk of wandering into New Age psycho-babble territory, I think that, in part, this is because teddy bears tend to bring out the sweeter parts of our temperaments. For instance, it's hard for me to conceive of someone like Josef Stalin turning out the way he did, if he'd had a teddy bear as a little boy.

[Elaine Viets]

Interesting theory, John, about bears and childhood. I didn't have a teddy bear as a kid, but I bought one when I got my first real paycheck. I still have it. The bear is named "Chocolte Turffle."
Elaine

[Elaine Viets]

oops. I mean chocolate truffle.

[Tom]

Ohhhh, but Elaine - as John says, here's the power of coincidence (and as if you had no experience with this)! "Chocolte Turffle" is a character name if ever I've heard one. She must be the islander cousin of Welsh opera singer Bryn Terfel.

[Tom]

John, what a fine story! It's bookstore day at our house, and we'll go look for your work.

Wouldn't worry too much about the opinions of your former colleagues. You made a quantum leap from your old life. Different energy state altogether.

[John Lamb]

Elaine, chocolate and teddy bears? Is there a sublime pairing in the universe?

Re my old partners, it's interesting that once they left cop work they did one of two things: Either they found a variation of police work or they pursued some sort of artistic endeavor. The latter group appear to be the happiest. Don't get me wrong...cop work is the most fun you can have with your clothes on. But once my career was finished, I knew I had to follow an entirely different path.

[Deni Dietz]

If you haven't read ECHOES OF THE LOST ORDER, do so. I love teddy-bears and even collect them (not like John does, LOL) but ECHOES is my favorite John Lamb mystery. Plus, John doesn't exaggerate. I've met his wife Joyce and she's beautiful.

[ramona]

Hi, John. Nice to see you at TLC. I agree with Deni--Echoes is a very good read. I have an autographed copy, from last year's book fest in Charlottesville.

I think Chocotle Turffle sounds like a Bond girl, but maybe that's just me.

[Katherine C.]

John, welcom to my to-be-read pile :) As someone who still often sleeps with her "Teddy" (hey, how creative can you really be in the naming department when you realize, at the age of 2, that your faithful fuzzy companion needs a moniker?) at the ripe age of 26 (there are worse things I could be taking to bed with me after all). Real men love stuffed animals. I cannot wait to delve into a bear-themed mystery.
And I agree with Ramona. Chocotle Turffle absollutely could be the next Bond girl.

[Lynn]

When we went to Vegas a couple of years ago, we went to the Star Trek Experience. My husband had to buy the Uniformed Teddy Bear he saw there. It now sits on our mantle for everyone to see.

[Gayle]

What a surprise after a particularly weirded out week salvaged from disaster and depression by the daily dose of TLC to find John Lamb as guest blogger. I've read two of the Teddy Bear mysteries and find the characters engaging and often wish I had them for neighbors. The stories are interesting and with some surprising off the wall twists that are not your average plot twists to keep us on our toes. If you haven't had the pleasure yet get to bookstore and then enjoy. By the way, there is always a bio of a Teddy Bear artist at the end of the book. I just wish the bears he writes about had the pictures in the book but them it be disappointed if they didn't match the pictures in my head.

[Marianne]

John,
What a brilliant story!! Now I'm curious enough about your books to go and get one, or two, or so... Just reading some new authors this week - so desperate to find new mysteries to read. :-D

Of course you have to take time choosing just the right face for a teddy bear - or any stuffed toy or doll, really. It's like choosing a friend, so it has to be friendly. I had a blue stuffed rabbit when I was little, but I bought a huge sitting teddy when I was living on my own in the big city (MElbourne) after breaking up with a long term boyfriend. I had to leave the teddy with someone in Australia when I moved over here 10 years ago. He was a cutie. I made him a white silk cravat, put an 'eagles and crowns' airforce insignia on it, and made him a black cloak. From that moment on, my teddy had a name and a personality: Taffy, Squadron Bear. Left over from my airforce years, I guess. I still think of him from time to time.

However, I did begin a new set of stuffed toys when I moved over here. Pride of my little collection is a stuffed Sushi Chef Mickey MOuse, a wombat, and a big orange giant squid. :-D

Cheers
Marianne

[John Lamb]

Hi Deni and Ramona, and thanks for the kind words about ECHOES, which made the Teddy series possible. A week doesn't pass without someone emailing me to ask when the sequel will be out. For those who don't know anything about the book, ECHOES is about a murder on a Civil War reenactment battlefield. Sad to say, there seems to be a perception that ECHOES has too much Civil War history in it, so nobody seems to want the sequel. In the meantime, I'm busy writing THE CLOCKWORK TEDDY.

Gayle: I'm glad you enjoy my descriptions of the bears and I wish I possessed the artistic talent to make them a reality. However, as Clint Eastwood said in one of the Dirty Harry films, "A man's got to know his limitations." We hope that someday either a bear manufacturer or artist will decide to make some of the bears.

Which brings us to the importance of the bear's faces. I've interviewed dozens of bear artists and they all essentially say the same thing: The most challenging part about making a bear is crafting the face. As one artist told me, "I have to look into the eyes and see a soul before a bear is finished."

Is it any wonder why we love them?